I was originally hired as an Emergency Medical Technician by a hospital. After a few years the local Fire Department took over EMS. The only thing that changed is that the taxpayers had to pay to have our ambulances repainted and we all got new uniforms.
One day while driving my partner and I get flagged down; the man's truck had caught fire. We could see visible flames between the cab and the box. My partner grabbed the fire extinguisher on the console and I ran around to the back and got the fire extinguisher from the rear compartment. We doused the flames before the engine arrived. We made our report on the radio and went back to the station to restock.
We were later told that the fire extinguishers should only be used if our vehicle was on fire, and not for civilians.
So, we were supposed to sit in Fire uniforms, in a Fire vehicle, and not put out a fire.
I'd demand that in writing.
We didn't get written up or lose pay, so it was a wash.
But yes, it would have been funny to do that.
I didn't stop to greet some customers as I walked in with a cane for the third week in a row due to nerve damage.
I wasn't on the clock, we didn't have a uniform, no name tag, nobody would even know I work there until I put my shit on after I clock in.
By that time I had made it a habit of recording every interaction with management, so I just pulled out my phone, hit the record button, and asked "so to be clear, are you officially reprimanding me for NOT doing work off the clock?" and that immediately shut him up.
Managers get awfully pensive when they have recording devices capturing them.
Worked for a small business which did electronics repair, and which had recently picked up e-waste recycling. Our boss, the owner, was known for getting baked out of his mind and imagining things which he needed to tell his staff, and would think the next day that he had actually told that thing to his staff. Just to give you an idea of the kind of guy the owner is, we had two company-wide group texts for the 11 people on payroll. One had everyone, and the other had everyone except the owner. The owner never knew about that one, and honestly that arrangement was a necessity to keep turnover low and by extension the business from running aground.
Anyway, my coworker is talking to a customer at the counter, who is dropping off an old television to be recycled. The customers leave, and the owner walks in.
Owner: "Wait, is this a plasma? We can't take this!"
Coworker: "why not?"
Owner: "We can't do plasmas! We've never done plasmas!" sees the stack of plasma screen televisions "What the fuck?! Who accepted these?"
Me: "Dude, you've never mentioned that we can't do anything with plasmas before."
Owner: "Yeah! It was in the class on e-waste recycling."
Coworker: "You were the only one who took that because you didn't want to fly anyone else to Vegas for a four day conference."
At this point I think the owner started to realize he hadn't actually disseminated anything other than the logistical aspects of the e-waste business to the employees.
Owner: "So, what, no one knows what we actually accept for e-waste?"
Me: "I don't think so, man."
The owner looks at me with obvious anger and with that look that says he's about to blame me for something.
Owner: "So, what y'all want a fucking list or something?"
Coworker: "Yeah, that would be great, actually."
The owner turned red, looked about ready to angry-cry, and walked out. Went home and got baked. I don't think he ever actually put a list together. The e-waste thing fell through a few months later after I left because the warehouse he was renting and illegally living out of was like a quarter the size needed, and there wasn't any money left for processing equipment. He franchised a corporate brand like a year later.
Fuck you, Matt, you goddamn moron.
I like how the company-wide group text tidbit had nothing to do with the rest of the story.
Reminded me of watching the extended cut of LoTR, where some scenes were just fluff.
Yeah, I guess it reads weird. I think I intended it as a early barometer to his character, but didn't expand or lampshade it properly. Oh well. It's a lemmy comment, not a graded CW essay.
No I instantly understood the kind of guy he was from that
I was written up for not being happy, and again for smiling too much later in the year. I'm a software test engineer.
I can imagine that writing unit tests all day long 24/5 may not make you smile enough at first and after while it can make you smile in scary way.
I'm an autist, following rules is mega easy. Boss says smile, I smile until he says to stop.
I reported the multinational company CTO for not being able to keep his hands off me (I'm a guy btw) and a load of other employees. That report came on top of other reports of abuse, fraud, and briberies.
Mind you, this company wa so about protecting whistleblowers that I had to sign a contract about it. VPs were outraged and vowed to protect me.
I made the report, week later called into an emergency meeting with the CTO and head of HR is there too and I'm fired. I sued, won, and in that time learned that the CTO was fired the next day because, amongst things, he fired me. Even so, they didn't cancel my firing, didn't rehire me, because now I was toxic.
Never trust anyone in big companies. Never trust their contracts, never trust their words.
We were changing office buildings and were packing our desks for the move. They have us boxes and bags for everything. The bags were oddly large, which I commented on by saying "these bags could fit a small child". Apparently some people took offense at that, as I was later sent up to HR to explain myself.
"Well... They were bags, they were large, and a small child could probably fit in them. What part of what I said is inappropriate?"
I find that often when you make people explain why they're offended by something, suddenly they can't figure it out. This will either make them realize it's not actually an issue, or more likely this will only make them angry due to the embarrassment they now feel for not being able to articulate it.
I like my workplace because I don't get in trouble for stuff like that. I was once talked to - asked if I had been snarky. I explained that I was and why they deserved it. I was basically told that I was right but it doesn't really help anything so try to avoid it in the future.
There was a super insecure manager a bunch of years ago. I didn't report to him, but occasionally worked alongside him.
I had been working with one of our customers for a few weeks on a feature they had requested. It was something out-of-the-box, so understandably, if you didn't know the context, it would be rather confusing.
Manager is set to run a meeting with them, and asks for my help as the technical expert. No problem. We get into the meeting, and the customer asks some technical questions. Before I can get a word in edgewise, Manager proceeds to pull the most inane shit out of his ass for a good 10 minutes--clearly knowing nothing that's going on, but not letting that stop him. After the customer is sufficiently confused, and Manager is starting to look a little panicked, he finally turns to me.
I figure I'll try to save him some face, so I start my reply with, "I'm not entirely sure, but are you asking...", repeating their question back. The customer is clearly relieved that I know what they're asking, and I provide the answers. Crisis averted! The meeting ends and I head back to my desk feeling good.
Until Manager storms up to my desk and proceeds to scream at me, "IF YOU'RE NOT ABSOLUTELY SURE ABOUT SOMETHING, DON'T ANSWER! NONE OF THIS 'I'M NOT SURE' BULLSHIT! NEXT TIME THINK ABOUT WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE FOR US!" and storms off. Nice projection, asshole.
I was new enough to not have the presence of mind to respond, so nothing came of it (though he was demoted not long after--possibly the shittiest manager I've ever known) so it all worked out in the end.
My take away from the “you have to be sure” projection part tells me he thought he knew what he was talking about
Or he clings to some "never show uncertainty" rule he learned about and ignore everything else.
I was written up for being too pessimistic. It was about 8 years ago, I was a project manager at a small retail company. I was in a small meeting with my boss and the owner of the company. I was telling the owner all the possible risks associated with this new project I was given, the major one being that we didn't have enough time to complete everything by the owner imposed deadline. Calling out risks is literally one of the main responsibilities of being a project manager. Also the meeting went fine, no one got upset, it seemed everyone understood. A few days later I get called into HRs office with a write up for basically being a Debbie Downer. I was told to be more positive with my updates and stay away from any bad news. I was in total shock! A few days later I put my notice in and found a new job making twice as much. So it all worked out in the end. Thanks for the motivation Todd!
Worked for a company that hired some Harvard guy who fired the QA team for "being down on the product." He didn't see value in a team of people who did nothing but test the software and report what was wrong with it.
Anybody who spends time doublechecking they're listed where they want in a group email needs to be fired. The company is not in the business of "your ego"
the person bringing the complaint is the one disrespecting everyone.
For documenting the accurate number of hours I worked, in a teaching lab. The department head didn't believe that the lab I taught (as a grad student) needed the hours it was given. Keep in mind, I had to do everything for the lab: create the lab manual, design lab activities, get ethics approval, create lab lectures, setup and clean up the lab, and do all the marking.
Turns out, the department used that document to pay me. This was never explained to me, usually we just get paid the set amount of hours, and I was of the understanding that this was just an audit of my hours to justify what I was getting. Turns out I worked about an extra 30% of the hours set for that lab for the semester. As a result, the department couldn't fully pay me until the following year because they didn't have it in their budget to pay for that extra 30%.
I ended up getting an ear full from the department head, but he backed off when I told him I was simply doing what he asked and that I wasn't inflating the numbers to get higher pay, since I had no idea they intended to pay me based on that audit.
Perhaps it's coincidence, or perhaps it was petty revenge, but later that year at gathering of the faculty and grad students he announced that I had won a major scholarship (one that would've paid pretty well for a grad student), and had me stand up in the crowd along with the other winners. Then, immediately after the assembly, he runs up to our lab office to tell me he read the sheet wrong and I hadnt actually won the scholarship, he just read the wrong name. I spent the next few days shamefully having to explain to everyone that, no I didn't get the award.
*edit: spelling mistakes.
He knew what he was doing.
My GF is a pool cleaner and once got written up for sending a customer a picture of dead pigeons that were in their yard.
The customer called the office screaming that she sent the pictures "to be mean."
Turns out these people had pest control out on their property to "remove" all the frogs because the frogs were "keeping them awake at night", and the birds took the bait instead.
Yes, these folks were filthy rich and entitled.
I got a verbal warning for referring to someone as a "guy" in my team's group chat.
As in "I've got a guy here who's running into issues with getting his loan processed. How should I proceed with assisting him?"
My language wasn't professional enough, and my manager pulled me aside to warn me not to do it again. I've since left the role, and my new team fully embraces casual conversation (my manager has outright exclaimed that "our software is a piece of shit" to much agreement). Things are much better now.
That is (hopefully was) a think in some very strict japanese companies. Also, when people had to stamp thing, they would angle their stamps to be "bowing" to the superiors who stamped first. I hope all those traditions are dead
Being mildly autistic, I usually think I would love Japan for that 'don't bother others' culture, but I'm starting to think it might actually be a hellscape for me.
I put an attorney's name in the "assistant" field of a work order. That bitch called the manager to say she worked too hard to become a lawyer for me to call her a secretary, lmao
oof, the insecurities
I was born with glass bones and paper skin yet somehow I can still withstand more damage than a middle manager's ego.
Used to work with an awesome chick named Velma. Boss pronounced it Thelma for three years. She finally started calling him Craig instead of Greg. Dude quit a year later after everyone else picked it up.
Weirdest would be that the CEO of the company I worked at then had one single runin with me in my entire tenure at that company and found that my facial expression wasn't to his liking.
I'm autistic and by that alone have little facial expression, add the meds I take for anxiety and depression and it results in that I have no facial expression at all.
So it pretty much came down to him not liking my resting face.
Tried to fire me for no reason, couldn't, because I'm in a protected class.
Managed to do so anyway by bullying me to no end until I accepted being fired.
Worst reason to be fired would be that I worked 48 hours straight on a weekend to implement vast network and server overhauls to then be fired for not being at work on monday morning.
I had the full clear from my boss and his boss and was not supposed to come in on monday unless something went bad with the upgrade (it didn't).
Simply not being there when my bosses boss wanted me to be there was all it took.
Both of those sound very illegal and you should probably have spoken to a lawyer. I’m sure you wouldn’t have wanted to stay at those jobs anyway but you could’ve at least gotten a nice payout.
I was working in the military. An office job at HQ so we had to use our parade uniforms. I was working nights one week and didn't have any clean black socks, I used white.
Around 8 in the morning I was walking up the stairs to leave and passed the Naval Admiral, who promptly chewed me put for wearing white socks and dress shoes.
Kind of surprised that you see that as weird. I served myself and would never dream of wearing the uniform improperly. Especially around stars and bars. HQs got nothing better to do than dress and appearance.
I guess just the fact that there are mails with six people in cc is an indication for how bad the order of command is.
My petty ass would be putting them in reverse-seniority order from then on out of spite. That would be the absolute funniest thing ever to be fired for.
I introduced myself to a new client (new job) and the boss didn't like that the client joked to the boss that he better watch out for his job because I sounded like a better [what we did] than he did. Which I was. Which was why he hired me. But a month later I was working somewhere else.
I told the CEO that not having a disaster recovery plan was a bad idea. He did not like that. Got written up the next morning. They wouldn't even tell me exactly why I was being written up. Only that I had "not done what I was supposed to" which was apparently to sit there in silence.
Got fired from that job a few years later. My bosses boss called me at home because he didn't have the decency to do it to my face. In that moment I panicked a little but by the next day it was like a weight had been lifted. That place was a complete shit show.
I was interviewing for a job as a movie theater manager.
In my neck of the woods there's a limited number of movie theaters, and everyone knows everyone else. So I was interviewing for the job when I'm told
"we heard through the grapevine that after you were fired from your last job you broke into the office and did something unspeakable on the carpet."
I still ended up getting the job.
I'm not OP but I still think about a series of events at my first job.
Would have been like 25 years ago, 3rd year plumbing apprentice and I was out on my own. Next job was for a real estate, the house was empty so I had to pick up the keys and then headed to the house, I was busting for a shit and the empty house was calling me. It was a blocked drain so I pulled up fast, cleared the drain before I shit myself and then went to open the back door.. and the key didn't fit, no problem I think as I heard around to the front.. key still didn't work. Fuck I'm in trouble here, there is no time to get to another toilet. I look around and see the access door into the crawlspace under the house which was pretty high, so I form a plan, use an empty bag to line a bucket and grab toilet paper out of the glovebox and head under with my homemade chamber pot. Do the business, tie the bag up and head to the bin to hide it. Once I open the lid I see the bin is completely empty.. I can't put it in there now so I put it in one of the big tool boxes on the back of the truck.
I ended up getting fired the next day, back then I partied pretty hard and was constantly late etc so definitely don't blame the boss. But the poop bag was never retrieved from the tool box. So at some point either the boss clearing it out or the next guy given that truck would have found a bag, opened it and see a big fat log.
I got in trouble for eating chips too loudly. One of my coworkers complained to management and they had my supervisor lecture me about respecting boundaries in the workplace. The thing is that the supervisor thought it was stupid too but he still had to do it.
Meh, I can understand it to an extent. Depends on the severity.
Someone at my workplace, rather than having a meal in their break, just keep crunching raw carrots at their desk for hours on end. I don't think I'd complain to management if I was sitting close, but I'd sure as hell ask to be moved somewhere far, far away from the carrot nutcase.
I'm in this situation all the time. Simple solution if you're worried about it: alphabetize them by first name. It's fair and if people actually care about crap like this, they can fuck off in general. At least if you're consistent with that, they can never complain. It's insane to me that it's a thing, but people are fragile and it matters a lot to some of them
I got in trouble for telling a senior manager that he was wrong on a technical issue. He sought expert advice on a control system but when the answer came back it didn't fit his conception of reality and he didn't want to hear it.
Turns out being good at management and being good at solving technical problems are skill sets that very rarely coincide in one person.
I always go alphabetically by surname, if i think the recipients care about the order. Still a hassle, but at least i don't have to decide who has a higher seniority.
"Huh, that's not the order I typed them, Outlook must have re ordered them when I sent it".
Feed them bullshit.
I had a really insecure young manager who was almost half my age. Guy was a chickenshit. One day, while he was out, we reorganized our desks so that we'd not have our backs to the hallway. Instead, we turned our desks 180 degrees so that our backs were to the wall. He came around and said "well, this layout is not in accordance with the open office rules". I paused for a second, looked at him and replied "Oh really? No shit! How cute..." And proceeded to ignore him solemnly.
He didn't do shit. Was eventually let go for complete incompetence and negative reviews from every single one of his employees.
People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.