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submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 84 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

THE official MAN CARD 😆

[–] [email protected] 67 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

And it's a bottle opener

Because nothing screams manly like alcoholism

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

If you need a bottle opener to open a bottle you aren't alcoholic

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

REAL MAN OPEN THEIR BOTTLE WITH THEIR TEETH

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

I usually just stick it in my ass and use my expertly trained clenched sphincter to open the bottle, like a real man.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So uh... the pair of channel locks I keep on my coffee table... Am I poor or an alcoholic?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

For starters, you don't own a very fancy coffee table.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Sorry I should have clarified. I refer to the trunk thats in front of my couch that has shit on and in it as a coffee table

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

And your couch?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

A wild Vance appears

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh well in that case, at least the couch is fancy. Jorkin Dapeenits has discerning tastes.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

TIL I'm actually manly

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

For the man who never fixes anything. It is criminal to not put some more tools on that card.