this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 120 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I’m sure this is satire from context, but it wouldn’t shock me if he did this segement

[–] [email protected] 107 points 8 months ago (3 children)

He's had it rough since he had to stop jacking off to M&Ms

[–] [email protected] 38 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

He can still do that! Just ask one of the image AIs for sexy anthropomorphic candies

[–] [email protected] 60 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Look would you rather he be doing his “job” or ogling the green M&M?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 8 months ago

You make an excellent point.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Dude just needs a chastity kink like the rest of us

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

Just be into getting beaten by an electrified chain like normal people

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

You're just part of the hairy butthole worm agenda!

[–] [email protected] 23 points 8 months ago (2 children)

No I’m a part of the waxed and clean butthole agenda

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Sounds painful, and what about bleaching then?

[–] [email protected] 81 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Honestly no idea if this is satire or something he really said.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Came here to say this!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Easy. It's fake because conservatives would never express the idea of a moist vagina as a positive. Female pleasure is an anathema to them because it means there isn't an unbalanced power dynamic favoring them

[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Ben Shapiro has entered the chat
"Well achtually, women's vaginas are meant to be bone dry. Every women I've slept with has been dryer than the Sahara desert."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

Talking about dunes...

[–] [email protected] 54 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Hold on, Benny Boy told me it's not suppose to be "moist", his doctor wife told him that. Not sure what to believe anymore.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago (2 children)

If you can't trust a talking head who's first journalistic work was to deny civilian deaths in the second Iraq war from the safety of the United States who can you trust?

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[–] [email protected] 46 points 8 months ago (3 children)

In Reagan's America worms looked like circumcised penises Exhibit A: Exhibit A

[–] [email protected] 34 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That ain't a regular worm tho, that's Leto Atreides II, The God Emperor, The Tyrant

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

Still a phallic looking worm

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

Circumcised? More like decapitated 😵‍💫

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

this was the best book

[–] [email protected] 34 points 8 months ago

First he came for my female M&Ms and I said nothing…

[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago (1 children)

The Pre-David-Lynch worm (as per paintings on mass market paperback books) was of the hairy butthole configuration as were those in the 2000 Syfy series.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Why do I get the feeling David-Lynch thought long and hard about the sexual symbolism of that worm?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

It's more like the designs were by H.R. Giger, whose design principle was "yeah but what if it was a vagina and/or penis?"

EDIT: Not quite right. Giger did designs for Jodorowsky's failed Dune project which Lynch took over. I would still say there some elements in the movie that look quite Giger-y. But his sandworm looked like this: https://www.reddit.com/r/dune/comments/qqavbd/here_is_hr_gigers_design_for_the_sandworms_which/

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Oh well that explains a lot. The dude literally elevated drawing dicks to a critical art form.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 8 months ago

He would think the 1984 version looks like a vagina. Because he clearly has never seen a vagina.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Tucker is looking rough these days.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago

Putin's teat will do that to a man

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Did they photoshop the orange tan on him or has he been taking beauty advice from Trump?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

If they did, they seriously fucked up by not making his eyes look melange-infused.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Anyone who visits Putin has to puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Oh yea, I forgot about his weird hardon for animated candy women.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago

I am just looking up news related to this, lol

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Look what they took from us!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago

the remake of beetlejuice is gonna be weird

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

why are conservatives so convinced that there is a direct correlation between viewing vaguely gay things and actually having innate homosexual attraction?

if this were true why weren't all the genx and boomer gays scared straight by the propaganda of their times? also why weren't the closet airport bathroom stall foot tapping gays turned straight by their hot Barbara Sreisand Karen wives

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You know how everyone is bald and pale on giedi prime and what baron Vladimir Harkonnen looks like.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

Dude so fat and full of cancer he has to use an antigravity suit to float his fat ass around to his growth popping appointments.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I prefer Ian McNeice' rhyming baron, myself.

Now...let the Emperor mock us, call us swine. Because in the end, his throne will be mine.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

The version had such poor casting overall, but Ian McNeice rocked it.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

That's downright post-modern.

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