[Trump pulls out a sharpie and starts circling the wrong part of the map]

"I AM PLACING TARIFFS ON PENGUINS UNTIL THEY GIVE US THEIR OIL AND SHOW ME HOW TO DO ALL THE DANCE MOVES FROM HAPPY FEET!"

Hey now, it's just the onion, there's no need to start cursin' willy-nilly here.

"I've said "jiminy jillikers" so many times the words have lost all meaning!" - Tim Walz

WHAT WAS HE HIDING

That he wanted six extra meatballs?

“He is weird! Right? I’m not weird, he’s weird.”

Trump: no u

It's pretty weird for an adult to spend this much time denying that they're weird.

a pro-Donald Trump chant broke out during a fire department ceremony last week

Donald Trump was on TV bragging about "owning the tallest building in downtown Manhattan now" while 343 of your colleagues were lying dead under the rubble of the twin towers on the morning of 9/11. He does not give a single shit about any of you.

When the reporter persisted, Decker explained that her father—a preacher born around 1933, according to the Courier Journal, or 68 years after slavery was outlawed—was “born into poverty” and worked for free with his family on the property they lived on. (It’s unclear whether the adults were paid, though the Courier Journal notes that it sounds more like “Decker’s father was forced by his parents to do chores” and that the family were tenant farmers.)

“My dad had to do chores when he was growing up 😭😭” - KY State Rep. Jennifer Decker

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Tucker Carlson is a traitor and a Russian asset.

I’m not religious and have plenty of issues with organized religion in general but I do support any Christians who aspire to live by the teachings Jesus actually preached. And it’s always good to see someone like this Reverend here, willing to call out conservatives who wear their supposed piety on their sleeves while espousing bigoted, selfish, reprehensible beliefs.

“She said something that I considered to be a false accusation,” he said, later adding: “I just wanted to defend myself, my family and, frankly, the presidency.”

You sexually assaulted her in 1996 you dumb sack of shit. It was two full decades before you fell ass backwards into the Oval office. This has nothing to do with the presidency. It's about you and your crimes.

Edit: The defamation claim is absolutely about the sexual assault taking place. That’s what he was referring to when he said “something I consider to be a false accusation”. Anyone trying to tell you this trial has nothing to do with the sexual assault is an idiot.

States that participate in the federal program are required to cover half of the administrative costs, which would cost Nebraska an estimated $300,000. Advocates of the program note that the administrative cost is far outweighed by the $18 million benefit, which the U.S. Department of Agriculture estimates would benefit 175,000 Nebraska children who might otherwise go hungry on some days during the summer.

Imagine being such a reprehensible monster that you'd let 175k children in your state starve rather than participate in a federal program that'd help feed them when school is out each summer. It's unconscionable.