this post was submitted on 19 Feb 2024
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TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name

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[–] [email protected] 66 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Should be "well, I will have been."

[–] [email protected] 48 points 9 months ago (2 children)

This is hardly the time to be conjugating temporal verbs in the past-impossible-never tense!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Where’s Dan Streetmentioner when you need him?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

"Anything that happens, happens. Anything that, in happening, causes something else to happen, causes something else to happen. Anything that, in happening, causes itself to happen again, happens again. It doesn't necessarily do it in chronological order, though."

(Yes, I know that's from a different book in the series.)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Was ist, ist

Was nicht ist, ist möglich

Nur was nicht ist, ist möglich

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I would never! unless you were already having been going to do that! and, in latin, there’s a tense for that: future imperfect (for referring to things that might have been)!

[–] [email protected] 28 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

One of the major problems encountered in time travel is not that of becoming your own father or mother. There is no problem in becoming your own father or mother that a broad-minded and well-adjusted family can't cope with. There is no problem with changing the course of history—the course of history does not change because it all fits together like a jigsaw. All the important changes have happened before the things they were supposed to change and it all sorts itself out in the end.

The major problem is simply one of grammar, and the main work to consult in this matter is Dr. Dan Streetmentioner's Time Traveler's Handbook of 1001 Tense Formations. It will tell you, for instance, how to describe something that was about to happen to you in the past before you avoided it by time-jumping forward two days in order to avoid it. The event will be descibed differently according to whether you are talking about it from the standpoint of your own natural time, from a time in the further future, or a time in the further past and is futher complicated by the possibility of conducting conversations while you are actually traveling from one time to another with the intention of becoming your own mother or father.

Most readers get as far as the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Plagal Past Subjunctive Intentional before giving up; and in fact in later aditions of the book all pages beyond this point have been left blank to save on printing costs.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy skips lightly over this tangle of academic abstraction, pausing only to note that the term "Future Perfect" has been abandoned since it was discovered not to be

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

the future is flawed and everyone's tense

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

There is no problem in becoming your own father or mother

"Or"?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Predestination%20(film)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Why yes, I am going to make you go down a TV Tropes rabbit hole for hours.

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TimeTravelTenseTrouble

No need to "fuck you" me, you're welcome.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

"Time travel. Since my first day on the job as a Starfleet captain I swore I'd never let myself get caught in one of these godforsaken paradoxes - the future is the past, the past is the future, it all gives me a headache." ~Captain Janeway

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

They're coarse and irritating, and they get everywhere!