Games

I'd land in a minefield, with only numbers to help me out.

I am god of the beavers.

I'd be hanging out in my nice Minecraft city my friends and I are building. Honestly wouldn't be too bad

Odds are that I get run over by a train shortly after. Also the factory must grow.

Valheim, so probably killed by a falling tree.

Path of Achra - the game speaks for itself.

BG3, so I'm either getting body snatched, horribly murdered, or laid.

I'm playing golf?

How unlikely! How fortunate I took so long to play Golf Story!

Lucky me, I live in Stardew Valley now. And I'm never going back.

If my regular Apex Legends experience applies, I've got about 30 seconds to live and no hope of my teammates reviving me.

Factorio. The factory must grow.

Grow the factory.

WH40K: Darktide. In the grim dark future of the 41st millennium I am so F-ed in the A.

It's animal crossing. I eat some fruit and then forget and hit a rock and break it.

I spend three years locked in a tiny capsule and then die because the engineers forgot to add parachutes.

Rimwold. I'll be dying from an infection caused by a chinchilla's bite.

Hang out with a bunch of cool dudes, do some diving, make some sushi.

Sounds pretty ideal.

I'd be miserable in a basement, flinging my tears at flies and poop.

I'd look pretty out of place as an overweight 43 year old man playing in the Women's World Cup.

Caves of Qud. Guess I'm a farmer now. The world is very dangerous.

Groan. That means I am stuck in boring but pretty Starfield forever.

Guess I would finally build an Outpost 😆

Stuck in the liminal space of THPS 1 and 2. Skateboarding forever. Alone.

Ffs i only olayed one match of Starship Troopers... Im getting dismembered by an oversized animstronic alien ant

Get fucked 25 different ways by a megacorp.

My minecraft mod pack so id basically be the god that created that universe.

I’m so glad I decided not to play Alien Isolation tonight.

Punching trees hurts.

Brain damage (rocket league).

~~I would go bowling with my cousin.~~

Oh wait, I forgot I played the RoboCop demo. Uh oh...

Note: The fact I forgot about playing it probably doesn't speak well for my enjoyment of the game.

I'm trying to learn how to read in war-torn Bohemia in the High Medieval Ages :/

I'd be living in the slums in Night City and have a higher quality of life than anyone I know in real life

I die. Just like I do in CS2. Shouldn't have started again, I'm just too old for this shit.

Elden Ring. If it's anything like my playing experience. I'm dead within 2 minutes.

I go and live a peaceful life in Kakariko Village

Shitty time to have dusted off plants vs zombies. Guess me and crazy Dave are buds now. If you need me, I'll be rummaging through the kitchen cabinets looking for a helmet!

Does D&D count? I could probably have a decent time finding some magic item and then just using it in daily life.

Darktide?

I'm either getting killed by Nurgle cultists, or by the Inquisition for being weird and knowing heretical words like "Democracy" and "Human Rights".