this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2024
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[–] [email protected] 136 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Because the undigested corn kernel husks are filled with poop.

[–] [email protected] 78 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

TIL I'm corn because I'm full of shit

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 week ago

If that's true, I'm an entire cob.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Well, you're certainly not a logician

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (4 children)

But like why did they fill up all plump and not just be like a deflated balloon.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Farts blow open the empty kernels like a plastic bag in the wind, then the poop gets in them

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Finally someone with a science based explanation

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (18 children)

Most people dont chew more than 2-3 times so its kinda expected that stuff goes down unchewed

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I compulsively chew at least 11 times in a vain attempt to diminish my obesity. My lack of a sizable beer gut(versus most of my peers) shows promise, nevermind that I basically don't drink, but I assure you, the corn does not care.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Disclaimer, I have dysphagia, so this isn't meant to be the average person's experience, but... I was eating when I read this and counted how many times I chewed when I took a bite until I felt comfortable swallowing and it was 47. You're telling me normal people can chew as low as 2 times? Astounding.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

I'm in the zero to ten camp for most foods, but right there with you at 47 for fatty meat of any kind. It feels disgusting in my mouth and to swallow it without gagging I need to basically cut it up with my incisors into smaller and smaller pieces until the texture disappears.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"Corn? When did I eats corn?"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

This is the most alarming experience. Especially in the middle of winter when fewer things have corn readily included

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago (2 children)

At least find an uncensored version. Jesus. So dumb.

[–] [email protected] 96 points 1 week ago (7 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Seems like an extreme reaction to a reasonable request

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I have a flair for the dramatic

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago

Magikarp used splash

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago

"Jesus. So dumb."

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago

Cornshells are tough AF and we're shit at chewing.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

If you really want to discover something crazy, swallow some raisins whole.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Do they come out as grapes

[–] [email protected] 30 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

God I hope they re-hydrate and come out plump and poo water filled

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Pop 'em right back in your mouth for a juicy treat!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

I don't particularly care for raisins but I might have to go get some to satisfy my curiosity.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

The T-1000 variant

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I auto downvote anything with fucking censorship

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

That's more like it

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You have great reaction memes, and I'm shamelessly harvesting them.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This censorship is so weak that I honestly think it's parody at this point.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

https://sh.itjust.works/post/29385078

Edit: Also just so you know, your downvotes on 196 are just a shout into the void, considering blahaj has them disabled <3

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago

It has like 2 pixels of white on the u, I had to scroll back up to know what you were talking about.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I'm allergic to corn, so I don't know if this is true, but if I pooped a food that was still whole I'd consider not eating it again.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 weeks ago

The outside of the kernel is very fibrous, so when chewing it's less about breaking down the outside and more like popping the insides out of its skin. We need all kinds of fiber in our diets, so the outside of the corn kernels passing through is just fine.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What happens if you eat corn? Can you eat tortilla chips?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Not who you asked, but I'm allergic to corn. Tortilla chips, cornbread, anything made with corn starch, cornmeal (including pizza because people use that on the bottom of pizza), some gluten free and some vegan foods have triggered allergic reactions for me.

It's extra fun trying to find food I can eat that I haven't made myself, because I'm also allergic to wheat and eggs.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

You actually make me feel better about my recent celiac diagnosis. I'm sorry you've got to deal with all that though, that sounds terrible.

Are you allergic to wheat or are you also celiac?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

you're supposed to chew 30 times, but who has time for that

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