this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2024
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Just a thought I had, like what can a ten year old do(besides mass murder & accidents) that messes up their life so badly that it is unrecoverable?

It has to be something that is self inflicted and not something that is the cause of others around them.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 hours ago (2 children)

Growing up in a house with sa at any age. For me I raw dogged life for my adult years blocking it out but stuff catches up and can be catastrophic.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 hours ago

trigger warning


sexual abuse


[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

I feel that. I'm about to be 23 and now it's on my mind again for some reason and idk what to do.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 hours ago

I grew up in a hoarder house and I'm pretty sure I ruined my life by teaching myself to do the dishes as a kid. I was expected to keep the place clean for the rest of my childhood, and that turned into me being the only one to do chores of any kind. I was actually guilt tripped into skipping college so I'd be available to drive my sister to classes.

So yeah forget all the drugs and murder and shit. The real worst thing a child can do is wash a dish.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 13 hours ago

Having success in sports, entertainment or anything that pays out real money. There's not a lot of happy stories about child stars.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 23 hours ago

You're never too young to die, so the saying goes.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Being conceived by shitty people is more than enough to have a life arguably ruined permanently before it even began.

So much can happen to ruin a person's life at any stage, even pre-conception.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

OP is asking about wrong/bad/poor choices etc, the last sentence of their post specifically says it's not about situations that are inflicted upon them.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 hour ago

You're right; those were poor choices by the parents.

Really, the question is more about "When do we stop attributing bad choices to the parent and start attributing them to the child?"

Because babies and toddlers can make lots of stupid decisions.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 22 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

To be fair, OP is asking about bad/poor/wrong decisions, the last sentence of their post specifically says it's not about situations that are inflicted upon them. No one gets to choose where they are born.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If, when you're born, you don't choose to be rich, that messes you up forever.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I was watching a Netflix documtary about killers, the guy said he was on drugs by age 9...so pretty sure that messed up his life before the murder. It is debatable on if surroundings or self choices are why you try drugs I guess.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It takes a certain kind of environment to enable that.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago

Right, "should I do drugs?" is not a typical choice for a 9 year old to have to make, they should be protected from that. I have heard stories of particularly shitty parents giving drugs to their own young children.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Agreed. Also Nancy Reagan told me not to, and I was not in a position to argue.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Well, if Nancy said so, it must be true.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Any significant injury that results in paralysis would be a potential candidate. These become possible as soon as you become old enough to climb things like trees.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

A kid in my class put his arm inside a... I don't remember if it was a lion or tiger cage back on the 70s before safety was a thing. Being armless isn't the end, but I bet he regretted that decision.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

There went all his hopes for an army career. No more pitching for the Mets. No more professional arm wrestling. No more rowing competitions, or stirring huge pots of gruel.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Diving head first into shallow water comes to mind

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Also: eating random slug you find on the street.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

Nah. You could still be nominated for director of HHS.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

yeah. rat lungworm.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Drugs at any age. Sure you can get clean but it takes a very pacific type of person to do that and there are more people who have failed then ones who have succeeded. I made the mistake of using drugs at a young age and it has destroyed my life beyond repair. If there are any young people reading this just remember it's not worth it. Trust me nobody hates drugs more then drugheads.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Any age? Sure someone can drug and rape a 5 year old. But even with 8 it's hard to get the cash for a proper addiction. You mind sharing about what age you fucked up to calibrate my compass?

In the end, this was about self inflicted damage. Not someone abusing you.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago)

Well, no one does date grape for fun. No one's addicted to date grape and it doesn't matter if you have the money as long as you have the taste for it. I started doing drugs at age 14. Things like weed, benadryl, LSD, glue and shooms. In the long run I shouldn't have done it but I will admit I do have some nostalgia for doing them with my old friends.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I remember as a kid, I met these other kids that would drink from the side of the street. That sewer water was full of nasty including gas and oil runoff from the roads and who knows what else.

I also had an ex that would drink the chemicals under the sink as a tiny kid.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

That's crazy... where did you grow up?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 hours ago

Los angeles

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Playing with fireworks, firearms, or chemicals can be a solid way for anyone of any age to ruin their life.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

But doesn’t that count as an accident? Kids who play with fireworks don’t cram a steel can full of black powder imagining how cool it would be to loose your fingers and eyes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Maybe kids are too short sighted to see the risk, but who says they don’t do that? Among the stupid things I did as a kid was try to turn any tube into a gun/cannon/firework mortar, and hold it in my hands to aim and launch. We even had the benefit of my grandfather losing a couple fingers as a cautionary tale, that we completely ignored. If something happened, could you really call that an accident?

Or the time we were playing with fireworks …. In a barn full of dry hay? I don’t know how my grandfather let us live after that one

….. but there’s a threshold of stupidity where you really can’t call it an accident. I’m happy to have survived in one piece all too many bouts of stupidity but the adult me wouldn’t call it an accident if something happened

[–] [email protected] 2 points 16 hours ago

Hmm. I guess there is a category that isn’t entirely premeditated and intentional, nor is it a freak accident either. It’s sort of like an accident, but it’s caused be reckless stupidity, as opposed to something beyond your control.

As people have noticed, there are lots of reckless decisions that can ruin your life. I guess that fits the description of what OP was looking for.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

Be born a woman in Afghanistan... come out the womb to "And that's when she knew she had fucked up."

I'm not certain if this is in the spirit of your question but even a murderer in the US has privileges denied to a lot of other people.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Actually, the younger you fuck up, the worse are the consequences. A 13 year old go in a school fight, he is kicked out of school, has to go in another school further away, sleep less, see his grade fall down, and next year he'll be pushed to start an apprenticeship rather than high school.

A 31 one year old (otherwise a good citizen) does the same. He'll spend a night in police custody and at worst pays a fine (with a high probability that change are dropped because judges and prosecutor are busy)

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago

I agree with your general point but I don't agree with your example because apprenticeship can still lead to stable employment and a fulfilling life

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

what can a ten year old do(besides mass murder & accidents) that messes up their life so badly that it is unrecoverable?

kill their own parents (it's not technically mass murder until you've killed three people).

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

A ten year old can rush out into the road and become paralyzed for life.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Whatever the country's age of criminal conviction (typically 18). It's hard enough to get a job WITHOUT a criminal record.

Depending on the country and/or crime, a juvenile record will also prevent being able to work in certain jobs/industries.