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cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/3368216
Do it again, but include sneezing this time.
If you fart and sneeze at the same time, your body takes a screenshot.
But there's a small chance of it making a printout on your underpants.
Core memory
Then add cumming
Stop pretending like you don't fart when you pee, there's no shame in it. That's typically the time to moan, if you're going to do it.
All while you’re looking your urinal neighbor straight in the eye.
Relevant username
checks community
Yep, we're in the right place, boys.
Reading this was very confusing until i realized some people don't sit down to piss.
I imagined someone ripping a fart at the urinal.
Happens all the time, nothing to be ashamed about.
Would be a little uncomfortable if something solid comes out though.
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(1 replies)
Ah yes, I often shit while I shit.
Yea, Me too
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Sometimes you think youre done and as you go to wipe, guts are like "but wait, theres more!"
Personally, I'd find it very concerning if I went to piss and farts started coming out instead.
If you hold farts in till you go to the restroom, its a natural time they'll come out as you relax while peeing.
But farts aren't supposed to come out of your pee hole.
...Right?
Urethrarts are dangerous, consult a doctor
What am I supposed to say, "Doctor, I pee carbonated."
Imagine if poop came out!
No, I don't think I will
What does pee holes have to do with it. It's just about relaxing the muscles in the area that were holding the farts and pee so the farts come out too.
I said that I'd be very concerned if I pissed and farts started coming out instead. Like, I went to pee but farts came out of my urethra.
Not with that attitude.
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(3 replies)
Iirc that's called a Fistula.
Where is the case where I'm being efficient and do everything in 1 go?
That is the entire second row about
What like brushing your teeth or showering?
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So pissing while farting sucks but farting while pissing is OK?
Do you drop trou and stand in front of a toilet every time you need to toot the flesh whistle?
Yeah the top one is accidental so if you're farting you're probably still wearing your pants
I always put down my pants when I fart.
Farting in the office must be doubly awkward.
and aim at the ceiling. we call that room "pollock's corner"
Same for shitting/pissing.
Center bottom is all wrong. Should be this:
I haven't stopped shitting for the last... checks watch twenty two years. Any combo is nice. The triple is a beaut
The picture doesn't do justice to the evil that is sharting. Especially in the middle of a long run.
Tis better to be pissed off than pissed on
That's a matter of opinion.
This is well thought out
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I honestly think I’d rather shit myself while farting than piss myself. If you shit yourself you can hide it and clean up. If you piss yourself everyone can see.
I feel like you're overestimating your ability to subtly shit yourself.
Nobody shits themselves with a solid.
And the smell. And the potential liquid.
Yeah, sharts aren't exactly known for being a solid log.
Everything is nice while shitting
A remarkable example of a non-Hermitian operator
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this post was submitted on 03 Sep 2024
273 points (94.2% liked)
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