this post was submitted on 01 Sep 2023
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News

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[–] [email protected] 104 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Tl;dr:

"I don’t want to hear feedback. Just do your job.”

“We value you. But a promotion isn’t in the cards right now.”“

"This is on a need-to-know basis. Information will be shared when the time is right.”

“We can talk about compensation at the next review.”

"We need to fill this role. Let’s not share those details with candidates.”

"I called you last night at 9:00 p.m. Why didn’t you answer?”

"We don’t have time for fun.”

[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Honestly, it's missing the following gems...

"We are looking for an industry leading ninja..."

"We're a work hard, play hard team/company"

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I would also add any sort of variation of "at this job, we're like a family!"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

A Manson family

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago

"Fast paced work environment"

"We are family here"

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“We treat our employees like family.”

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I joined a " we are family" company and got shouted at by the founder because I wasn't a mind reader and didn't do something I had no idea needed done.

Sounds exactly like family, except I was hired into the position of toddler.

Fuck that noise.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I’m reminded of this guy I fired after he ghosted me when he no-call-no-showed.

“Wait? You don’t treat everyone like family?”
“No. I treat everyone like employees.” The look on his face was kinda priceless.

(For the record, I do try to take care of my employees, and the minimum there is paying what they’re worth- but the relationship is definitely employer-employee. The relationship is inherently transactional; pretending otherwise is exploitation)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“Industry leading ninja” is so cringey. It’s like a very out of touch old guy trying sound relevant. I AM an old guy so I have some knowledge here. 😀

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Ninja, literally, "invisible", or perhaps generously, "spy" is such an insane term for a business to use anyway.

It connotates someone who is willing to break the law - kill if necessary- to bring down the opposition. Not someone connecting a new API node for Slack notifications

They probably actually mean Stakhanovite, but wouldn't bring themselves to use a communist term (/s).

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

News just doesn't mean what it used to

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Sorry, I couldn't find a better sub. It's like misc news I guess? So I just posted it up hoping to get some decent chatter going in the comments.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lemmy users hate these 5 weird tricks for boosting engagement

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

lmao I guess so huh? I don't know man. I appreciate just having a few simple subs and posting to them though. I think thats what I was really getting at. I got the news article from google news and thought Id share it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Companies that are or feel they are doing big things in the world give you a spiel about being part of something big and you should be proud and being part of such an amazing company is worth it even if there may be less compensation than might be possible at another company or other industry.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I can't parse this into anything meaningful.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Ha ya I had a bit of trouble getting that out.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Companies that feel they are "important" treat their employees like shit

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Yep, and tell you you should be proud of it.