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Belching (sopuli.xyz)
submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 160 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I would reject this pull request. Why is the indenting all over the place? Why is your keyword capitalisation all over the place? WHY YELLOW?!

Edit: the more I look at this the more it pisses me off. Wtf is going on with your kerning? Just random number and placement of spaces. Also, why is the table name in caps? Who does that? Select * is lazy. Do you really need every field about a girl? Really? Worst of all, not a limited request. I sware this is just the kind of thing that would return 30 million rows and brick the database for twenty seconds.

[-] [email protected] 30 points 2 months ago

You are now a Certified Rejector. Stay sharp, keep the wheel rolling.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

You forgot some: Why is there no space after SELECT?

Why are boyfriend and smallwaist not questions like is_cute and is_crazy? Either all boils are with a verb or none.

Also why is smallwaist not in snake case? It should be small_waist (or better yet has_small_waist or even better waist = "small")

Also also boyfriend should be null not false, this would solve multiple issues.

And finally the only positive thing is the * itself, because selecting only body would be even worse. 🤣

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[-] [email protected] 147 points 2 months ago

Guy with a belly asks for girl with a small waist. The half-assed ugly shirt will do it.

Instant woman repellant.

[-] [email protected] 68 points 2 months ago

I feel confident in assuming the guy who would wear this shirt seeking “girls” between the ages of 18 and 26 is himself no younger than 45.

[-] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago

Ah I missed the age gap.

Would this guy qualify as an OUTER JOIN? (Sorry, SQL is not my native language)

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

I sure wouldn't want him as an INNER JOIN

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

yesss I'm 42 so I can wear this shirt with pride!

[-] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

And married.

[-] [email protected] 103 points 2 months ago

At least he's wearing the red flag on the outside.

[-] [email protected] 82 points 2 months ago

One of the reasons women will find this repugnant is because they didn't normalize their tables. Should be boyfriend_id is null.

[-] [email protected] 52 points 2 months ago

For that matter, why is waist size a Boolean?

[-] [email protected] 41 points 2 months ago

They allowed business logic to pollute the DB table, and "small waist" is a defined range in some confluence doc somewhere.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

And why is cuteness and craziness binary?

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[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Why is there a separate table for men and women in the first place? Shouldn't there be a person table with a many to many relationship with itself (because polyamory exists)?

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Or, if you allow for polyamory and non-hetero relationships, you probably need a rel table (and some joins in the query).

Maybe GIRLS is just a view...

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

That structure doesn't handle polyamorous and cheating relationships very well. It should probably have and (select top 1 1 from dbo.relationships r where r.partner_a != GIRLS.id or r.partner_b != GIRLS.id) which would handle also LGBT+ relationships or relationships that are better represented as a graph.

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[-] [email protected] 46 points 2 months ago

I can already imagine a 40-something year old manager coming into work wearing this

[-] [email protected] 40 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

The pallette for the syntax highlighter is horrid. Hardly readable.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

But it is highlighter colour!

[-] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago

This is why we have codes of conduct.

[-] [email protected] 32 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

ERROR: permission denied for "GIRLS"

[-] [email protected] 29 points 2 months ago

~~and smallwaist = true~~

and itty_bitty_waist = true

and round_thing_in_your_face = true

[-] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

is_sprung = true

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

It should be waist_size=1

[-] [email protected] 29 points 2 months ago

Who says programmers don't have a sense of humor?

No one. It's just what you pretend people say to make yourself feel like some kind of special exception.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago

shitty taste <> "humor"

[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago

Gonna sound racist but deal with it.

I constantly meet asian developers (Singapore , India, China, etc) with this edgelord personality. They come to American conferences and meetups, say some wild sexist shit, and someone has to politely let them know not to.

Some backtrack. Some apologize. Some literally freeze up and pretend like it didn't happen.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago

We do still live in a bubble in the west. We're fighting for equity across genders and race, while some parts of the world are still questioning if sexual harassment against women at work is really that big of a deal.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

Many of my guy coworkers have been (and are) sort of misogynistic, and homophobic (I'm in India). It makes me really uncomfortable. Might start reporting people to HR one day.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Just get to know HR first. They might be mysogynists themselves (even if they are female).

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[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Should be age > (my_age / 2) +7

[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Found the programmer thread that criticises the data model instead of the t-shirt

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Why would there be an age and my_age column on the table GIRLS?

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Good point.

Should be age > (@my_age / 2) +7

FTFOP - now my age is some value defined outside the immediate query.

More likely, the GIRLS would be a view of some table persons and you could query my_age from that table too.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Because for each girl you meet, you might tell her a different age.

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

Most SQL Dbs use bits, so it would be WHERE field = 1

The entire shirt caused me 4d6 psychological damage.

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

This is not funny and any man wearing this would probably not pass a similar test using any woman's criteria. If I saw someone wearing this my first thought would certainly not be "hey this is a guy with a great sense of humor and I would like to hang with him!".

[-] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago
[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

He forgot the "TOP 2" qualifier.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Heh. That reminds me of the feeling when I carefully place a LIMIT 100 and get 0 results...

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

🙄🤦‍♂️

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Big pp energy over here

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

This is the most Indian shit I have seen this week.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

most infurating part of this is the mixing of cases

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this post was submitted on 01 Jul 2024
263 points (92.6% liked)

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