this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
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UK Politics

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HOW IS HE SO BAD AT THIS?

He should've said, 'Look, I was very fortunate growing up, there's no point denying that. What I want is for every child to have the opportunities I had, that's why our policy is to blah, blah first-time buyers blah tax, etc., unlike Labour who want blah VAT on private schools, blah'.

Instead, he gets immediately rattled and starts gibbering at the first follow-up question. He is just the worst.

By the way, this is the interview he thought was so important he had to run away from Normandy to do it. Apparently, it wasn't important enough for him to do any prep.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I'm beginning to think he hates the Tory party even more than I do

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 months ago

I mean the Tory members elected fucking Liz Truss over him. He must still have an axe to grind about that.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I figure he's decided that's he's squirreled away enough graft money and is deliberately trying to get booted from office so he can pull a runner.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Think you mean grift, this ponce has never done a hard day's work in his life.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget, he's allowed to claim £115k of UK taxpayers money for the rest of his life after he and Boris dismantled a bunch of the safety nets for UK society.

"Dole for me, not for thee."

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I'd actually be in favour of this if they weren't allowed to take any other jobs afterwards. I reckon doing that removes a bunch of incentives to do nefarious things while in government

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

I am also generally in favour of it too, especially reading about world leaders back in the day that went destitute by having to pay for their own security.

It's just ironic that this fund was established for Thatcher, and generally is claimed by PM's who are independently wealthy.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Nah, it actually is graft, because it's specifically him using his government position to enrich himself, for instance by taking bribes. Grift is the general case of dishonest money, although there's usually a connotation of scam involved.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

I mean I'd call bribes dishonest money

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago

It's the only explanation that makes sense.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Look, I've been searching all morning, and I simply cannot find a violin tiny enough for Sunak's horribly deprived childhood.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

He also didn't have a tiny violin as a child.

Actually, he did. It's just that he's so tiny it looked like a cello.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I guess that's the problem. Getting a violin that's tiny enough for Sunak means it's so tiny that I can't see it.

(Although I am no taller than Sunak is. At least I am wider. 😂)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Probably have to teach a tardigrade to play it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Amazon sell 8cm violins called worlds smallest for £6.

Would be hilarious if a few hundred turned up addressed to Rishi at 10 Downing Street tommorow evening.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Oh that would be awesome! Do you think they can actually be sent there, or do packages to No 10 get redirected for security reasons?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

No idea. But likely the redirect thing.

Pretty sure amazon turning up with a few hundred tiny violins. Will make news though. Simply because someone is paid to open them.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Is he trying to throw this election?

I mean, I'm delighted that every time he opens his mouth they drop another 3 points in the polls, but I've no fathomable idea how a man can be so utterly useless. It's like he doesn't only not want to be PM any more, but he doesn't want to be official opposition either. Like he just wants to go back to his nice mansion and lie on a big bed of money doing fuck all.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

To be fair, if those were my options, I certainly wouldn't opt for a life of politics

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Then why doesn't he just resign? Why is he throwing the election intentionally.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

Because only plebs give up power! A true aristocrat squanders all options to leave as little as possible behind.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

I'm beginning to wonder if he's trying to throw it intentionally, and as badly as possible, so that he vindictively destroys the careers of all the MPs who have done nothing but plot to stab him in the back since the moment he became leader. There was a rather telling moment (yesterday I think) when he listed previous home secretaries but pointedly skipped Nutella Braverman. Sunak is certainly tetchy enough to go "fine, I'm going down and I'm taking you all with me!"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

You'll have to ask him. I can only answer for myself. Happy to do an impromptu AMA on what I would do if I were Sunak

On that note, I would definitely resign today.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Oh noes! I thought this was going to turn around the campaign! My surprise knows no bounds.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Do you think he does mock interviews or does he just refuse to do them.

I cannot decide if he does mock interviews and everyone on his staff is such an idiot that they can't come up with obvious questions like this, or if he just refuses to do them because he's arrogant.

I'm inclined to think it may very well be the former because the whole administration just seems to be pathologically incompetent. For all his faults, and they were many, at least Cameron's administration probably could organize a piss-up in a brewery.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Cameron was the last PM who actually got things done. They were bad things, sure, but he did do them.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Now now, Boris got brexit done. It ended up being a complete pig’s ear, quite possibly from the same pig Cameron was acquainted with, but it did get done.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

I was considering whether to mention that and I think on balance you're right that it did Get Done and I should have included it. Mea culpa. In my defence, it was world-historically shit.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Sounds like an Onion headline

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Why do you need Sky TV? Freeview ought to be enough for everyone.

Hell, I'm not didn't in the UK and I enjoyed CBBC. I can't remember how I got access to it (because geoblocking, which is bullshit), but I liked it. I can't say the same about news programming because fuck that amirite?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

He's older than Freeview. He'd only have had four channels, the poor soul.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They still had some cool stuff I'm sure.

Also, wasn't CBBC a programming block during this time as well?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Now, you mention it, I do remember that. They used to do Marvel Hour on Saturday, with the X Men show. It was the tits.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

I wasn't around for that stuff and I kinda wish I was.

But even then, I wasn't in the UK anyway.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

during my childhood, you needed sky to watch stuff like nickelodeon and CN. shit was mad expensive, basicallv useless in the rain and had ads. It was awful

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

That's why you made friends with someone who had it. Then you went around their house and ate wagon wheels and watched Totally Spies, and felt things.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

Sad. We had free to air versions of those on satellite (although Nick closed in 2011 for... honestly I have no idea why they closed it down)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

The rate at which Rich-i keeps showing his foot deep into his mouth makes me admire his dexterity and flexibility.