this post was submitted on 06 May 2024
142 points (77.1% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] [email protected] 79 points 6 months ago

I hate this so much. Enjoy your upvote.

[–] [email protected] 56 points 6 months ago

screaming slide whistle noises

[–] [email protected] 46 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I’m a woman and still I find this meme gives me the heebiejeebies. Stop that.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 6 months ago

You have a urethra, too. And you can even put things in it. Stop supporting the patriarchy.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

We've all got a urethra.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I mean how else are you supposed to unclog your cock?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

A bamboo chopstick would be better for the environment.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Extra splintery

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

I usually use the heel of my hand and hit it right on the 57.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago

It's fresher this way.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

So it doesn't stain or errode your teeth.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Would an internally rifled straw provide maximum jizz ballistics?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 months ago (4 children)

i know some people are into this and its called sounding, but i dont know why they would like it?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago (2 children)

there used to be a coffee shop in London that had a huge glass display case of penile sounding rods

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

I just know that my brain unilaterally decided to made room for this fact in deep storage immediately, I just wish I knew how important whatever got tossed to make room was.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Did you use past tense because they sold out?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I think they were a victim of the pandemi

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

There are more nerves inside the penis than outside.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Are there actually?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)

Because once you get good at sounding, you can get a hollow sounding rod inserted in there and get your partner to pee in your bladder so you can pee it all back out all over him.

Not that I know anything about that.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

woah, that's like advanced piss docking, I've only seen that in my animes. nice.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Well, that's enough internet for today.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I think it is a masochism thing

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

more of a trombone situation really

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Thanks. This is definitely something I needed to see while eating

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Is this around when you normally eat? I would like to schedule sending this to you on a daily basis.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I eat when I’m hungry AND remember to eat

Those conditions must both be met so you will never track my eating habits

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Alexa, set reminder on this guys eating times

Well, you're fucked now

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

NOOOOO HEALTHY HABITS

MY ONLY WEAKNESS

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Or have I planted a seed in your mind so now it will pop into your head when you eat all by itself.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Dear god too powerful

Edit: spelling

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago

You ever accidentally stab your mouth with a straw?

Yeah. Imagine that but like a bajillion times worse.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

The numerous amount of people who suck at singing without lessons prove that addage incorrect.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

Where do I find this level of unhinged memes? I mortified my friend with this. And he requires more.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Life is just one long, hard kick in the urethra, and sometimes when you get home from a long day of getting kicked in the urethra, you just want to watch a show about good, likable people who love each other, where, you know, no matter what happens, at the end of 30 minutes, everything's gonna turn out okay.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I can vibe with this. Better use a straw to help protect from those kicks to better enjoy the show.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

It doesn't require lessons and it sounds good.

So i heard.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Yo Bro, Nah.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Urethra, I have found it!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Lol more like me_irl, amirite fellas???

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

The only thing I can explain how uncomfortable this is to read is that it's like trying to imagine scraping your nails on a old timey chalkboard

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

"yo yo ma!"

-Kramer

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