this post was submitted on 04 Apr 2024
339 points (97.7% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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Turnham Green? Turn um stomach more likely.

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 7 months ago (2 children)

£999/mo

Housing crisis? What housing crisis?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Housing crisis? You mean retirement fund? (j/k) 😂🔫

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Retirement fund? You mean my vespa scooter and a tide table for Beachy Head.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

You'll cycle there and enjoy it, right off the cliff!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

Cooperation owns all the houses and are leasing them for the low low price of you working 24/7. Yay!

[–] [email protected] 37 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget "sleep" - you get to sleep next to your oven. That way, you can smell if you left it on, or leave it open and use it as a heater! Think of all the advantages.

They saved a bundle on wet-wall, though. Genius.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Ahh, the ol' "we don't have proper heating while living in the north" treatment. Bonus points if all you have is a single radiator and you dry your wet hats and gloves right on top of it.

Such nostalgia.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago

The shower viewing sofa/dining room is a nice touch

[–] [email protected] 18 points 7 months ago (1 children)

This reminds me of a place I rented in rural FL for a year. 350 square feet. However, I had the Sense to install a curtain so you couldn't see the person inside of the shower.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago

Why? That's the entertainment!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (1 children)

All the space you need to exist!

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago (2 children)

its like prison but you get to cook your own meals.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Now say that with a smile

(⁠ꏿ⁠﹏⁠ꏿ)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Dear Warden, You were right. Salvation lay within

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

its like prison but you get to reheat your own meals.

FTFY

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago (2 children)

The wonky shelving is what really sells it for me. Also, you can wash your vegetables while you wash yourself, so, that's a winner all around.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

When I lived in Japan, I made friends with a bunch of fellow immigrants who were from China. They all thought it was completely normal to save water by rinsing their vegetables in the toilet.

I love Chinese food, and they can be some great people, but never again will I eat inside the home of a person who learned to home cook in China.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

In the cistern, right… RIGHT?!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago

This is actually a pretty nice little space compared to some of what I've seen in New York City. At least there's a door to the toilet.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago

Man, looking through that user's other properties, it's just depressing.
Nice looking family rooms and homes, reduced to bedsits and studios.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The rent on that is more than my mortgage on a 4 bedroom Victorian terrace with 2 bathrooms and a garden.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I’m betting you don’t live in Turnham Green, or anywhere close 🙂

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Thankfully no. Moving out of London was the best decision I ever made.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago

Shave, shower, and shit all in the comfort of your own kitchen.

What's everyone else doing? Is that not what the sink is for?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago

"Very nice" studio? I'll be the judge of that, twerp.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Thats called a frankfurt shower in germany

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

Isn’t that where Harry Potter lived at the start of the first movie?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I kept going back in confusion. There's the microwave and sink - no stove or flat-top or anything. There's the shower. What's behind the door nº 2? The depth of that space is maybe 70 cm, the standard depth of the kitchen furniture is 60 cm and the shower is a bit deeper, it seems. The width seems about the same. If that's a toilet, you wouldn't be able to close the door after yourself. There's no wardrobe in that room, only that small dresser. If there's a cupboard, what's the pooping situation? Waffle stomp day and night? Is that a toilet with a rod for coat hangers above?

Washing machine available? What does that mean? The choice between mini fridge or washing machine? Preserve food or wear clean clothes, make your choice!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I’m assuming the cupboard next to the shower contains the khazi, with the throne facing the shower. You’d be able to sit, at a suitable straining angle but unless you’re short standing for a piss is going to be a problem. I guess the washing machine is in a communal area somewhere in the building.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Possible that the toilet is shared, as it is in most of this landlord's other properties.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

What??? Not even a private toilet???

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

A toilet kitchen with a shower? Fuckin' luxury.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

Architect: me playing Sims

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

It just needs an icon corner now

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

With security deposit, the first month is only £1998!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Well it’s on Bath road

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

Shared toilet, no sale

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

There is a rustless efficiency whore bath right next to the showerette.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

When I was house hunting a couple of years back, our real estate agent brought us to a house (a smallish but very reasonably sized house in the US) which had no bathtub. I walked into that bathroom, looked at her, and said I'm not buying a house without a bathtub. You know how much it can cost to totally remodel a bathroom? And the hassle? Fuck that.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

I just bought a house. 25% of the houses we viewed had no bathtub.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

.. just like in a caravan ..

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago