No Stupid Questions

Bold of you to assume my home is clean.

You're never going to be sterile; good enough is good enough.

Keep an abundance of cleaning supplies. Soaps and rags in the kitchen and the bathroom. Think about investing in a vacuum and a carpet cleaning machine. Edit = Also get more trash bins. One for the kitchen, one for the desk, one by the coffee table, one for the bathroom.
Some people find it easier to do one big push where they clean the whole house in one session; other folks like to do a little bit every day. Figure out which type you are.

Also, check and see what cleaners charge in your area. It might be worth it to have a pro come in and do the work for you. Figure out what your leisure time is worth to you and then compare.

I have a roomba to get rid of 80% every day. I strive to manually vacuum once a week, because the roomba doesn't do corners and some hard to reach bits. Nor can it do stairs, obviously. After vacuuming I run a steam mop over the floors, which is amazing and SO much faster than regular mopping, without any cleaning agents.

Since its a combination steam mop/hand thing, I also use it for the windows. That's not on any schedule, just when I think they're dirty.

I wetwipe the countertop after I make dinner, and I clean it with soap whenever it looks dirty enough to be worth the effort.

Honestly, things like wooden floors can be hand-scrubbed four or five times before being actually clean, but it feel that anything that's stuck on there after running the steam mop is probably not coming off during normal use, so it qualifies as clean enough.

I pay someone to clean once a month. I hate cleaning and it's worth the $200 to me.

I keep my sink clear of dishes and take out my own trash, but the rest is just stuff I don't want to do.

Beyond that, there's dusting, cleaning windows, sinks, countertops, bathrooms, and probably things I don't even consider.

Of all the items you've listed, I personally rank floors as the most important to clean, followed by bathrooms, countertops, sinks, windows, and finally dusting. These are in order of which are used more frequently and how easily they'd be noticed. A dirty window (on the outside) is rarely dirty enough to outright block the sunlight, but grime on the floor will be tracked into other rooms, worsening the issue. Bathrooms are used daily, so would bother me if they're not at least reasonably seemly.

For keep floor clean, the zeroth step is to prevent dirt and grime from coming in at the onset. A shoes-off policy in the home is probably the most substantial in this effort. That's not to say you have to go barefoot -- although I do think it's quite nice -- since indoor slippers or shoes are an option. The next step would be to rip out all wall-to-wall carpet, if possible. I have a full rant about the drawbacks of carpet, but it will suffice to say that carpet traps dust and dirt whereas hard surfaces like tile or laminate do not.

After that, you may need to identify what exactly is dirtying your floors. If it's loose particulate (eg food crumbs), that's going to need a different solution than if it's loose hairs, which is different than dust or clothes threads. Crumbs or hair might suggest localized sweeping in the kitchen or bathroom will be most effective, while dust or threads suggest you need to adjust your clothes dryer settings, or your central air system needs a new/different filter.

The thing to keep in mind with all this is that grime does not come from nowhere: there is always a source, and the evidence will lead you to what's most effective to keep your home maintained. Even if you conclude that the dust is fallout from the nearby coal-burning power station, there will still be things you can do, such as ~~campaigning for a fossil-fuel free world~~ electrostatic air filters or keeping doors closed when not needed.

I do the dishes as soon as possible, wipe the kitchen surfaces daily if used, I scrub the toilets the second they don't look sparkling (to prevent gross buildup, maybe every 10 days, there are no stand-pee-ers in this house spraying piss everywhere lol), my Roomba runs every 2 days to get most dust on the floor that normally would get kicked back up, and I pay for some house cleaners to come once a month to get what I missed and do a better job at it.

The best advice I have is one I found on the internet: Whenever you walk through a room pick something up and dispose of it, or put it back in its place.

Daily tidying tasks: dishes asap, litter box, laundry, spray cleaner on the shower after showering. Once a week the more laborious tasks get done: vacuuming, mopping etc. Bathrooms every 3 weeks or so. It’s a constant rotation that I would struggle with alone… my spouse and I tag-team all cleaning together so that helps. Consistency with cleaning helps everything to stay relatively clean. If it ever gets to be too much to keep up with in the future, we’ve agreed that a weekly cleaner might be a good option to help us maintain.

Roomba. OK, not exactly, but I have an offbrand bot that does touching up and my wife and I take turns doing a proper cleaning of the floors every couple weeks. It’s not perfect, but it’s presentable. Neither of us are going to dedicate too much time to keeping things perfect. Cleanliness is important, but take care that it doesn’t become an obsession at the cost of your other interests.

Robots do vacuuming and mopping at least once a week, some areas more often. I do basic cleaning of the kitchen regularly and more in depth cleaning occasionally. Bathrooms are about the same but less frequent. I find getting stoned really helpful for staying on top of cleaning, it's a much more enjoyable experience.

If you’re sweeping, it’s possible you’re kicking a lot of dust up in the air, so that by the time you’re done mopping, it has resettled back down on the floor. You could mitigate this by vacuuming instead, or opening your windows and using fans to blow air out of your house. But also, you’ll never get all of the dust anyway.

It feels like it’s never actually clean.

Keeping things neat and tidy is literally an endless battle against entropy.

I mean, it's not like I can get rid of the waterbugs in my eyelashes when I take a shower. Becoming truly "clean" would mean destroying all physical traces of, well, everything. We would have to be made of pure energy to be really "clean."

In short, the organic biological world in which we exist will always be interminably filthy.

I use a crosswave, and it's disgustingly effective at cleaning floors. It's basically a self cleaning Swifer wet jet.

I used it on floors that I mopped with a traditional mop twice right before, and the water was dark brown when I finished.

I keep up on my hvac air filters to help with dust, and have a no shoes in the house rule.

I have 2 kids under 3…

laughs maniacally

I've always considered paying for cleaning a little posh, but with children and both working full time it's an easy choice. We'd always prioritise other things than cleaning in our free time, so it wouldn't get done. It is also tax deductable where I live.

Do you just sweep with a broom? A good vacuum cleaner is a lot more thorough. And if you mopp right after there's a better chance to get most of the dust.

The other question is where the dirt is ultimately coming from. Most notably rom outside via air movement and shoes, but also consider shedded hair and skin from humans & pets, dropped food crumbs, lints from textiles and any hobbies/activities.

I like to avoid any "dust catcher" objects like carpets or rugs. In the end it's a tradeoff between how clean you want it to be and how much time you're willing to invest.

I bought a good vacuum cleaner and a steam cleaner. That and microfiber rags.

Clean as you go. When you’re done with food, wash the plate or put it in the dishwasher. When you’re done with your shower, take yesterdays dirty clothes downstairs and put them in the washing machine. After you are done dressing in the morning, wipe down the bathroom sink etc with the hand towel. Buy a roomba and set it loose before you leave for work.

Robots

I clean the kitchen pretty thoroughly once per week after meal prepping. By thoroughly I mean do the dishes, wipe down the stovetop and counters, clean the sink with dish soap and a sponge, then sweep and mop. During the week I try to clean up small spills and such as I go and load the dishwasher after meals.

For the bathroom, I usually do once per month. Clean the counter, mirror, toilet top to bottom, and shower top to bottom. Sweep and mop.

Living spaces and bedroom I sweep/mop/vacuum once per month and clean tables as needed.

I hardly dust or clean windows. I maybe do that a couple times per year or if it's particularly filthy.

The general idea for me is to clean regularly and as needed so that nothing is really nasty at any given time. Anything else gets done roughly once per year or on move out.

Like the cleaning of a house... It Never Ends. Robot vacuum once every other day. Try to get to physical vacuuming of stairs etc. once a week along with cleaning toilets etc. Actual mopping of floors maybe once every two months? It is clean enough not clean.

Change your air filter, check for dusty air ducts.

i don't, its a nightmare

wait til' it gets bad enough to bug me, then clean.

We're almost there.

I usually just deep clean once a year and wash the floor multiple times over until it's pretty clean. Then I let my robot vacuum/mop keep it mostly clean twice a week the rest of the year. The robovac helps enforce a cleaner lifestyle by ensuring things aren't left out and about. The floors will never be perfectly clean though, just the nature of life~

As for everything else, I set reoccurring calendar tasks to space it out but I try to do one area per weekend. Keeps cleaning manageable but regular.

At some point the shame overcomes the laziness and then I clean it.