“While Kentucky doesn't have an ocean, it does have aquariums. In 2006, at least 12 people at Kentucky's Newport Aquarium were bitten by sharks while at an exhibit that allows visitors to touch the animals”

Keep in mind that this aquarium is just across the river from the zoo where parents let their kids fall into the gorilla exhibits.

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/outreach.png

They swim up the Mississipi

NEW MEXICO?!?!?

Non-midwesterners: surprised

Midwesterners who've had a fear of bull sharks since their friend told them about them when they were 5: see I knew it could happen

Could it be loan sharks?

Bull sharks yo

The chances of a shark attacking you on dry land are low but never zero!

Ah, the elusive lank-shark!

NM, IL, KY, PA?

Just realized New York has a lot of shark attacks unless you're taking about loan sharks where the fuck do you get attacked by a shark in the toxic wasteland that is the entire state every water source is a pond full of garbage and other stuff you really don't want to touch

Okay, but New Mexico??? We barely have lakes here!

Sharknado motherfucker

flying in the air sharks

now that's some kind of horror

Could it be a zoo? No, that would be too easy

Sharks Georg, who lives in Missouri with his shark collection, is an outlier and should not have been counted.

Bull shark attack in the Ozarks no? At least that is what all the locals claim haha.

THERE'S A SHARK IN THE BATHTUB

🎤🎤 Scary flying shark, scary flying shark, Careful you, he's out hunting in the dark 🎤🎤