404
Scientists Train Full-Grown Man To Ask For Help When Needed
(www.theonion.com)
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 28 Dec 2023
404 points (96.3% liked)
The Onion
4259 readers
542 users here now
The Onion
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
When will they train People to actually help as opposed to simply advising platitudes?
Just man up
Walk it off.
Remember guys, it’s okay to not be miserable
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Kek
https://youtu.be/ELkgiJD9KuM?si=Grh0PgpBJ2G6u-0y
Or, just squeeze them hard enough to squirt the juice into life's eyes and say, "next time I want cold hard CASH DAMMIT!" Or just take some prozac with a slice of lemon.
Hydraulic press time?
That's good for if you happen to get into your atomic discombobulator when a fly is in there and you come out being half a man with a fly's head. I hate when that happens - back to the hyudraulic press again!!
You just gotta keep your eyes on the prize.
It's true that people need more than just nice-sounding phrases to help them. When you're down and out or feeling suicidal, saying "don't be that way, life is good" isn't going to help anybody. Sometime just being there to listen instead of giving advice is the most helpful thing.