this post was submitted on 24 Aug 2023
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Cool. So someone I bailed out of a sticky situation financially after they had a shit breakup and breakdown has shown their true colours tonight. I've blocked her pretty much everywhere, because she's a bit of a terf it turns out. "Trans women aren't women, they don't any have ovaries." blah blah. But she still owes me 500$. I asked a mutual friend to ask her to contact me. Both he and I spent weeks and weeks in 2021 coaching her back from a terrible breakup. He also had a lot of trouble getting money back from her. Now she's saying I'm poison. Sometimes it costs a lot of money to rid yourself of the parasites in life. The worst thing is she'll be badmouthing me now to any other old friends we have in common and possibly outing to me to people I have nothing to do with for very good reasons.
Should I take her to small claims court?
I spent $3000 to get my ex out of my house when we broke up; she stayed for 3 months after we split and extorted me. Told our mutuals that I was a transphobe and I broke up with her bc she's trans (mtf). They believed her over me.
I say you got off cheap, no offence. I have no advice for small claims I'm sorry.
Hugs to both of you. None of it is fair.
I just don't understand how so many people are awful to friends and loved ones.
And I hate how this economy with low wages is making choices in relationships and friendships have such deep potentially awful consequences. The poverty wages is giving us fewer choices.
Thanks, I'm quite happy to have a just scraping by wage this year or even this and next year but I've set myself up for very low housing costs. Just when starting a new job and waiting on centrelink to grace me with the god of the health care card it's tight without delving into my hard earned and sacrificed for savings. To quote a stupid tshirt, "I am gay and $500 is $500." That what is says isn't it?
That’s awful. Those types of people also tend to be super manipulative with everything somehow and you end up losing everything including your friends.
They are really the worst type of people and hard to get away from for one reason or another.
Im glad you don’t have to deal with them anymore.
Thanks! I'm very pleased and humbled with the messages of support.
Thanks! It actually makes me feel better. I knew when I blocked her from everything I'd probably lose the cash, but now I could really do with it and I thought she'd be a fucking decent adult about it. Now I know she's a perpetual victim.
They all are, those kinds of people, they get off on the attention that being a victim gives them. But they're usually very toxic in reality, narcissistic and unwilling to be responsible for their flaws and actions.
It's shit, cos it also means she's gaslit me and my mate, who were sincerely caring and spoke to each other at length about how to best help her. We were supposed to "sisters", as we were really close once. I guess when the new people all see someone's true colours, they go back to the old people they dissed years ago for support hoping to find a sucker. She complained about a whole scene turning their back on her. Maybe it's because they know her better. Can you call her a bitch so I don't have to?
Ill do you one better: she's a cuuuuuunt
You are cool and hot.
Have they no shame?
I guess it depends on whether that $500 will be worth having her on your mind for some more months, and seeing her in court.
Would love to see her in court more than have the cash I think. Outing people is so fucking not on, she's already done it to some people I really left a long long way behind. This is one reason why you see the trans rights are human rights banners at our pride demos and marches. It's actually a human rights violation.
Would you take a small business to court?
a couple of years ago, 500 was not really a lot of money . Like I could cover it back in a couple of weeks. today it is. I've deliberately taken a year to work on my transition and health both mental and physical. I'll talk to my very litigant ex lawyer friend and get back to you. The shitty thing is, I loaned her 1000 and was actually going to gift her the whole lot, cos you know, don't loan ya friends money etc and I'd made a bunch selling the house. But she said that wouldn't feel right, so I suggested paying half, which she agreed to and mentioned a bunch of times after. No go deed goes unpunished. Crap thing is it's the last time I'll help a friend financially, cos fuck getting burned twice and the next person might actually be more in need and less of a cunt.
I bet you're not the only person she's stiffed. Think about all the people she's dissed in the past and you will find they were probably people she has abused and taken advantage of as well.
That's a depressing thought, but yeah, you're probably right. Complain, play the victim, get everyone to support her then move on to the next chumps who'll listen. I've known her over 20 years and yep, now I think about it, it's a pattern. I think Spud is right, I probably got off light.