Criteria: I'm looking for instances that are defed' with the Big 3 tankies (lemmygrad, lemmy.ml, and hexbear). I have no interest in trying to persuade my friends to create an acc and set up instance blocks before diving in, or dealing with the feedback when they run into the tankie brigade.

Edit: lemmy.cafe and infosec.pub seem to fit. I also find it really interesting just how many of the replies totally ignored my stated criteria.

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[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 23 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago) (3 children)

.cafe is the only major one that I know is defederated with all 3.

https://lemmy.cafe/instances

[–] catloaf@lemm.ee 12 points 6 hours ago

I have noticed a lot of accounts from that instance being quickly created and banned. I don't know if they're trolls or spambots, but it seems like they don't have very good control over who creates an account there.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 6 points 6 hours ago

Thanks!

[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -10 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

It doesn’t block porn instances though. I’d argue that because of this sopuli.xyz might be better choice even if it doesn’t block lemmy.ml.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 12 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Thank you for deciding my criteria for me 🙄

[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -10 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

Title: „Which reasonably sized instance to recommend newcomers?”

Criteria: „I have no interest in trying to persuade my friends to create an acc and set up instance blocks before diving in”

OP: „but what about me”

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

Yes, let's just ignore the entire text body? I know there's a joke about never reading the article, but this is a level above that.

[+] misk@sopuli.xyz -8 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

I won’t argue that I know what was your intention when asking the question but you definitely didn’t phrase it as criteria for you specifically but rather newcomers in general.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

My post started with 'Criteria: I’m looking for instances that are defed’ with the Big 3 tankies', which you conveniently left out of your quote. That direct statement was not clearly phrased enough?

[–] misk@sopuli.xyz -4 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

It’s very clearly phrased. I’m saying that if you want a newcomer instance then defederating porn instances is more important than instance that doesn’t really go out of its way to interfere with other communities. Sopuli is actually one of the first instances to block Hexbear outright when other big instance admins hesitated to.

[–] AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

I want a instance that I'm comfortable recommending to my crowd. I listed the criteria that I needed for my specific group of friends, and porn is not something that is an issue here. Maybe as a secondary criteria, but that's a distant second.

[.ml] doesn’t really go out of its way to interfere with other communities

Yes, but I'm not willing or comfortable recommending anything that's got a bunch of .ml comms on the front page.

[–] misk@sopuli.xyz -3 points 4 hours ago

I don’t have problem with porn either but it’s just not convenient. If your instance doesn’t block porn instances then your All page will be flooded with junk and you’ll have to painstakingly go through blocking them yourself. It’s easier to have a separate account for porn if you want to use Lemmy that way.