this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2025
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

Alright everyone its parachutes today, ive got a bet going.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Party pooper here.

You know when fast food workers post images of things like stepping bare footed onto a bowl of salad?

To me, this is the equivalent for pilots. Safety, checklists and routines, take time. Don't go posting on social media that your are competing in this space.

Ps: the post in question is arguably not too bad. But, if this is "a thing", then I'd suggest to be careful to be associated with it.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Safety, checklists and routines, take time.

Walkarounds and such are done before takeoff, and you aren't taking off early, especially not in an airliner. In-flight checklists don't take more or less time, since the airliner is going whether you want it or not, and the pilot does not / can not just set the throttle for a faster speed. It's fine.

There are two major factors influencing travel time on an airliner, neither of them have anything to do with doing stuff faster with less attention to safety. They are airport organisation and prevailing winds.

If your departure/destination is competent and there are less complications from overworked ATC or other planes being late on arrival/departure, you're most likely fine.

The big thing though is wind. A head/tailwind can affect your ground speed to a degree of +/- 30% in extreme cases, so these are harmless. It's not even up to the pilot "going faster". There are similar posts and even articles about airliners "breaking the sound barrier", eg. having a larger ground speed than the speed of sound in static air on the ground.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Weren't airlines purposefully inflating trip times because of the Biden administration's rule changes on trip refunds?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Boeing is doing the low% speedrun where you try to get to your destination with the least aircraft parts.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

At this point arriving at the airport is optional.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Stretch goal: Arrive before takeoff.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Concorde has entered the chat.

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[–] [email protected] 184 points 2 days ago (8 children)

JFK to LAX, any % of passengers.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 2 days ago (2 children)

If it was any% of plane, there are some creative launching strategies we could explore.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

And landing

[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 days ago

Boeing has entered the chat

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Used to lead big hikes. We had an "80% return rate is good". Partial bodies counted.

Yes, this was a joke for attendees.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It's funny that you can have a 99% return rate and everyone is dead because they are missing a main artery or something

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Works for me. Just gotta meet those numbers.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Hmm, after reading my contract carefully, there's nothing in there that explicitly says I actually have to wait for the passengers and baggage to be loaded before taking off...

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

[halfway through the flight] "Dang, I can't make this time. Going to reset"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago

Just type in the 7500 cheatcode and you can take shortcuts through military airspace.

[–] [email protected] 104 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Southwest Airlines pays their pilots a bonus for every minute they block in early.

Guess who has a reputation for bugging ATC for shortcuts and taxiing really fast.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Aha, I knew it! Flight attendants get paid per 'flight' hour and the pilots get bonuses to reduce the amount of time the attendants are paid for. That's fucked up

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Pay is usually per flight hour, but also paid on a block-or-better basis. The minimum pay for completing a leg is the scheduled time, but if there are delays, then actual time from parking brake to parking brake is paid

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Oh, that's better than I assumed

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

parking brake

This a fwd model? Get me some McDonald's trays, I'm gonna show atc a cool trick

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 hours ago

Pilots are going to radio in asking for more ice on the runways.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 73 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Ooooh, so that's why I saw a plane doing janky backwards jumps before being flung off into the sky.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (3 children)

click uh, ladies and gentlemen this is your Captain speaking. Wha. Hoo hoo. Yahoooo! Yahoo! Yah! Yayayayaya! click

(Edit: wrong sound)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

subjects everyone to 15g force.

I mean it might make the flight less boring, since everyone just passes out.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hey guys desinc here, today I'm gonna show you some tricks and glitches in real life

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

LGL to ATL usually is a 2 hour flight. Wonder if they had more time booked due to air traffic.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

Block time (airlines calculate it differently) was traditionally viewed from “block to block”, the time the wheel chocks were removed for the aircraft to move under its own power for departure to the time the wheel chocks were put back under the wheels at destination. Now it just means what the airline thinks the flight time will be for scheduling purposes.

As a passenger, this is what you see when your app tells you the flight time. It includes taxi out and taxi in.

Delay-prone flights are often over blocked, so a perfectly delay-free flight (push, taxi, takeoff, fly, land, taxi in, park) that takes say an hour and a half total might me blocked for 1:50 because historically one of the airports might be busy at that time an they know there will be a long taxi, gate holds, whatever.

So sometimes fate smiles on everyone and you get to leave early, miss whatever built in delays there might be planned, ATC gives you a couple shortcuts, a favorable wind, and bam, you’re in 30 minutes early.

So not really a speed run, just lots of luck.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

The RNG gods giveth and the RNG gods take away.

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 2 days ago

Ladies and gentelmen this is your pilot speaking, I've gone ahead and put the seat belt lights back on because Marlons a fucking showoff and thinks he so great. Buckle up and hold tight.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

Sometimes I like to speedrun deliveries in American Truck Simulator. Turn off fatigue (roleplay my driver as addicted to energy drinks and cocaine and pees in bottles) and drive at 105 mph (168.981 km/hr) halfway across the country.

Get there 3 days early, because faster deliveries means more Value^®^ to the shareholders.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 days ago

I definitely enjoyed when trucks showed up 3 days earlier than they were supposed to when i ran a shipping dock. It definitely didn't fuck up our whole system, no way.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago

Get there 3 days early, because faster deliveries means more Value® to the shareholders.

If you aren't providing Value® the shareholders. You have to ask yourself, "Am I good employee?"

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago (1 children)

No no no, that's only 52 minutes early. He left 2 minutes before the scheduled start time. Quit trying to boost your stats, man!

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[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 days ago (6 children)

Collision detection isn't perfect. If you save and load just at the right time while moving forwards you can sometimes clip through walls. So walls are basically just a suggestion. The only problem is that if you mess it up, you die and loose time due to the unskippable death animation...

But no one messes that trick up right?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So what im hearing is that 9/11 was a messed up speed run?

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Do they allow clipping? Or is that a different category?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Not since that failed attempt.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago

A TOS shows that if you do an out of bounds glitch you can trigger the loading zone under ground because they stretch to the bottom of the sky box.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

Freebird intensifys

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Checks out. I always try to fly Delta when possible. Had the least amount of delays from them.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 days ago (4 children)

I'm assuming getting all your passengers there is considered a 100% run. I think the players branching out into lower % runs will open up some pretty big time savings and make for much more interesting runs.

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