this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2025
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[–] [email protected] 152 points 3 days ago (2 children)

if you ever feel useless just remember that Fifa has a subcommittee on human rights and social responsibility.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's to make sure there aren't any white people working in the sweat shops.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Might be a damage control group tho

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

that would make it even funnier

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago

He uses it Flintstones style

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 days ago (3 children)

AFAIK flash does actually need to consume calories and all that, so maybe it's better than running literally everywhere.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This was a plot point in the recent Flash movie.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

And the show, many years before

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Also allows him to carry additional people and items, and store the items. However, might be better to have an SUV or similar for greater and more secure storage.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Now I need a comic where a Flash uses the speed force to carry the entire Justice League Watchtower into another dimension and it just follows the characters who now have to live with the fact that they failed in their original universe. Green Lantern retires because the hope is gone, Aquaman works out a schedule with the new universe Aquaman so they can split the responsibilities of head of Atlantis and superhero work, etc.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Hmmmmm ackchually a green lantern's powers are based on willpower. Blue lanterns are powered by hope 🤓

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

JLA #89 (1997)

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Most media just has superheroes consume regular calories for their body size it seems. Where does all this extra energy come from? Guess Flash has the speed force, Hulk the gamma radiation, and Superman the star power. Only two I remember someone eating extra calories is Pecorine from Princess Connect and that one girl who can create anything from My Hero Academia.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

Flash just does mukbang offscreen.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

No, I specifically remember the flash drinking his coffee with double digit number of sugars in the Justice League cartoons.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

And I seem to recall a few times where one of the various flash-like characters ate a huge amount of food without thinking about it. Wally ate a 3-5 gallon tub of ice cream that had been meant for someone's birthday, if I recall.

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 3 days ago (1 children)

When I was 6, I dreamed that Superman was showing me his new car. And in the dream, as a six year old, I was thinking, “Why do you need a car?”

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Writer Cary Bates says that the Supermobile was created as a promotional tie-in for the Corgi Toys toy line: "In my opinion, whenever merchandising needs are dictating story content, the odds of any real creativity or inspiration are severely compromised".

Yah, we could tell...

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

In the '80s that was reversed. Most of the cartoons were created to sell toys

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

You mean the teenage mutant ninja turtles, trained to operate in the shadows, didn't really need a blimp??

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

About as much much as Rainbow Brited needed a horse

Or Liono needed a sword

Or the Silverhawks needed existence

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Two things.

1: People hardly ever look up

2: They had access to the water mains, and probably spiked the city water with LSD before they took the blimp out.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

All you people never heard of laziness?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

Bro just let the dude's feet rest, laziness ain't got anything to do with it.

https://youtu.be/xQ9C-pao0lw

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 days ago (3 children)

They don't let him in the drive thru unless he has a vehicle.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So that why Sonic has a car as well?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I'm not sure what Sonic's deal is. I'm pretty sure he can't afford the drive thru.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

I went through the McDonald's drive-through on foot once

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Are you the Flash? Cause you beat me to posting this joke.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Could he learn to vibrate his genitals so fast, that they become a blur? That way he could walk around butt naked but no one would be able to see anything except a blur down there.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

The webcomic something positive did a strip where he figured out how to decapitate with ejaculate

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Is the flash able to turn off his mental speed as well? Or is he living in this frozen hell?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I don’t think it’s a waste - we know he can bring things with him when uses the Speed Force (his clothes), so being able to travel without needing to run and use up stamina isn’t the worst decision.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Can he bring his bike using the Speed Force as well?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I mean you are faster on a bicycle than walking, so if it uses him as a power source, then he could probably go faster with it than the he can run.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

A bike yes, but a motorcycle has its own power source

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Do we know this comic book motorcycle isn't powered by the Speedforce?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

You’ve gotta think sometimes he feeling lazy. Or is going somewhere he doesn’t want to show up at all sweaty.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I mean, would you want to run everywhere just because you can?

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

It's so he can slow down enough to ride with his super friends.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (2 children)

A super bicycle would actually make a lot of sense. A (super) Human powdered plane would also be pretty cool.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

God damn it, jokes so good I cannot edit my typo. 😆

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Dude can already run on water, and jump just about any distance, what does he need the plane for?

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

I guess this is for when her just wants to cruise real slow.

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