this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
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Memes

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[–] [email protected] 80 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Sorry, mountain dew tastes better than tea?

What garbage store brand floor scrapings sorry ass tea have you tried.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Okay okay you caught me.

I don't drink mountain dew, or black tea. I do drink some herbal tea though. Caffeine makes me sick overall.

I had this meme stuck in my head, then just brain stormed what title would get me the funniest comments.

So far saying mountain dew tastes better than tea has gotten some banger responses like this one, so all is going according to plan!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Sometimes the best memes are made by those who are furthest away from the subject matter. I'm over here with the 9¢ green tea bags from Wegman's though.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

The meme is about 4¢ tea bags. That's certainly not going to taste the best.

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[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Excuse me? Mountain dew (any Energy Drink for that matter) tastes horrible.

Tea all the way!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

You stayed loyal to tradition and are reaping the finical benefits for it!

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Mountain dew tastes like rat piss

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

What's wrong with your rats?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

More like what's right with them.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Just pee in your green tea and add a cup of sugar per cup of pee tea.

It will look like mountain dew and get you sweating like mountain dew and taste like SHIT!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Who let Bear Grylls in here?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Urine: the taste of the great outdoors!

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Whenever I really have to pee I say "why did I drink all that crab juice!" out loud and no one knows what the hell I'm talking about.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

You can't beat a well boiled cup of quality (loose) tea! Fuck the Dew!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Excuse me sir that's just bollock, dried leaves water is clearly superior.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You can pour a deciliter of sugar into your cup of black tea and it will taste the same as mountain dew.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

My cup is only a deciliter in size. Now there's tea all over the place!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you are drinking tea for the caffeine content it's best to steep the bag for as long as possible, iirc it takes about 15 minutes for ~95% of the caffeine to extract. One teabag usually has 60-80mg of caffeine so equivalent to one cup of instant coffee.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (5 children)

It's also gonna be super bitter at this point.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's why you load it with a half cup of sugar.

Or just slam it like you're doing a Jager Bomb

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Instead of caffeine I sleep for 7 hours

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sleep is the condition where you lose consciousness for a few hours, allegedly allowing your body and mind to rest. They say you then 'wake up refreshed.' Yeah, I know. These peasants will never stop finding excuses to avoid work.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (11 children)

Do i shit gold? Who the fuck buys tea in bags?

You pay at least 10x as much and produce a ton of waste in the process...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It really depends where you live, if all tea is imported bags are usually cheaper. 250g of budget loose leaf in Australia is $4 which is affordable and cheap, but you could also get a 100 pack of tea bags (approx 200g) for $2.50. So it's technically cheaper to buy bags. But only slightly, and the quality difference does mean it's often worth spending more for loose leaf.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Caffeine pills are faster and also dirt cheap.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Mountain Dew isn't only the worst caffeine fix.

Mountain Dew is the worst soda in general.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I think Mountain Dew is the best soda.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Meanwhile my ADHD brain: "Is that caffeine? Welp, time to hit the bed"

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (5 children)

[off topic] Chocolate covered espresso beans. Expensive as platinum but worth it. Check out high end candy shops and gourmet stores.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

Are a really easy way to accidentally give yourself heart palpitations and be awake for the next 36 hours?

Seriously those things are really good and before you know it the packet is empty and you are afraid for your life.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

I cannot stress enough how Disgusting mountain dew is

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Uh. Yeah, but you have to drink like 12 cups of tea to get to one cup of similar caffeine in coffee.

So, it's actually cheaper to make coffee at home.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

That's not true. Depending on bean extraction and quantity, a standard "cup" of coffee will have 100-200mg of caffeine. Black tea bags have around 40-60. A good rule of thumb is about 4x. Getting shit tier coffee goes for about $8/lb and will make around 30 cups, so about 25c per cup. So compared to the meme, coffee is still more expensive per mg of caffeine.

Edit: on Amazon you can get 200mg tablets for about 8c each. So that would be your best bang for the buck. Semi related, an old coworker would dissolve a caffeine pill in hot water and call it "Mormon coffee"; he was a character.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I consider the privilege of choice in taste of one's preferred stimulant to be one of the few small joys to late stage capitalism.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If you’re really hard up for caffeine, purchase pure caffeine powder. $20 is enough to satiate an average person for a year, or to overdose daily for a month.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Looking at the math it honesty looks like cheap black tea and cheap caffeine powder are about the same cost. Can get 400 tea packets for 15ish bucks, or a year supply for 15$.

Tea just is secret top tier.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I drank a lot of sweet tea and mountain dew in high school and occasionally coffee, then switched to energy drinks in college. Until I did the math on the energy drinks and bought a Keurig, which is convenient enough that I stopped my daily energy drink habit and saved a ton of money. Are there cheaper ways to get caffeine? Yes. Will my sleep disordered ass use any of them? No.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So post was actually inspired by a guy who was a rep for gas stations, so spent his day driving from gas station to gas station to like take inventory, make orders, and what not.

Where at each gas he would buy a single energy drink for like 5 a day.

Buying energy drinks exclusively from gas stations has to be the least cost effective way to get caffeine.

So while your coffee machine isn't the cheapest... by the stars you're miles ahead of that guy.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

maybe try different teas? even mixing a couple together?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Umm. Mt Dew is nasty. I'll take really bad tea any day over that.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Tea is best!!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Monster White is my bane. It's so good. It also has lots of caffeine. Send help.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Monster White sounds like slang for cocaine

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