I'm going to stick to clay tablets too. The guy down the street was cursed by the gods and his house burned down. Took all his beer recipes to Anu since they were written on papyrus. Good clay tablets fired well will last a long time and fire just adds some nice dark mode text.
The Internet in Ancient Times
Welcome to the stone age... or the bronze age... or the iron age... heck, anything with an 'age' is welcome, except our modern age or any ages to come.
This is about what the internet was like thousands of years ago back when it all started. Like when Darius the Great hired mercenaries via Craigslist or when Egypt invented emojis.
CODE OF LAWS
1 - Be civil. No name calling, no fighting, keep your flint hand axes inside your leather pouches at all times.
2 - Keep the AI stuff to a minimum. It gets annoying and old fashioned memes are more fun for everyone.
3 - None of this newfangled modern 21st century nonsense. We don't even know what "21st century" means.
4 - No porn/explicit content. The king is sensitive about these things.
5 - No lemmy.world TOS violations will be tolerated. So there.
6 - There is no ~~rule~~ law 6.
Laws of justice which Hammurabi, the wise king, established. A righteous law, and pious statute did he teach the land. Hammurabi, the protecting king am I. I have not withdrawn myself from the men, whom Bel gave to me, the rule over whom Marduk gave to me, I was not negligent, but I made them a peaceful abiding-place. I expounded all great difficulties, I made the light shine upon them. With the mighty weapons which Zamama and Ishtar entrusted to me, with the keen vision with which Ea endowed me, with the wisdom that Marduk gave me, I have uprooted the enemy above and below (in north and south), subdued the earth, brought prosperity to the land, guaranteed security to the inhabitants in their homes; a disturber was not permitted. The great gods have called me, I am the salvation-bearing shepherd, whose staff is straight, the good shadow that is spread over my city; on my breast I cherish the inhabitants of the land of Sumer and Akkad; in my shelter I have let them repose in peace; in my deep wisdom have I enclosed them. That the strong might not injure the weak, in order to protect the widows and orphans, I have in Babylon the city where Anu and Bel raise high their head, in E-Sagil, the Temple, whose foundations stand firm as heaven and earth, in order to bespeak justice in the land, to settle all disputes, and heal all injuries, set up these my precious words, written upon my memorial stone, before the image of me, as king of righteousness.
If I wanted people reading my words millennia from now, I’d chisel them into stones. My communications are private. Get with the times, grandpa!
Then soak your tablets after writing them!
Miss me with that woke shit! Next thing you know the slaves will want to learn to read!
Clay was good enough for my great-grandfather when he was putting his signet ring on a ball to identify the amphora as coming from his market stall and it's good enough for me to read the Epic of Gilgamesh on. I just don't get these Egyptians.
too weak. when me make strong word, tool makes hole in papyrus. clay much stronger.
PAPYRUS IS VERY POPULAR!! AND COOL!!
When you light papyrus on fire, it turns into ash. When you light a clay tablet on fire, it becomes stronger than before.
AND HIS PUZZLES ARE ALWAYS PERFECTLY IN CALIBRATION!
Works better than sea shells.