Doctor: I have consulted decades of scientific literature to diagnose your ailment and provide a treatment plan based on humanity's continually improving understanding of the biochemical workings of our bodies.
Chiropractor: I have consulted a book written by D. D. Palmer in 1895 who was a magnetic healer, anti-vaccine, and anti-medicine. He says you have ghosts in your bones and it's messing with your natural healing powers. I'm gonna crack your back now. Yes I'm a doctor. Well not a doctor doctor, but you know.