this post was submitted on 02 Mar 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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[–] [email protected] 83 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I'll walk out in front of traffic to own the woke moralistsup-yours-woke-moralists

[–] [email protected] 57 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 69 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Wokeness is when people aren't getting hit by cars

[–] [email protected] 46 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Jordan Peterson would really OWN all of us if he stepped in front of an F350 going 93 mph

[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago

Come on Jordan prove you aren't woke and do it

[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

The longer that a car doesn't annihilate your torso, the woker you are.

[–] [email protected] 59 points 8 months ago (1 children)

getting run over by ford 150 to prove that i'm a real man and not woke

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

they're not pedestrians, they're temporarily embarrassed monster truck drivers.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 8 months ago (1 children)

He sure talks like a supervillain a lot.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago (4 children)

With his benzo habit, I’m looking forward to him becoming an anti woke SoundCloud rapper with a supervillain Schtick. He can team up with the cosplayer who designed captain ancap.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago (1 children)

JP becoming right wing MF Doom is both so stupid it couldn't ever happen and so stupid it's the only thing that could happen next.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (20 children)

Who thought the name Captain Ancap was any good in the first place? Say that out out. It's a syllabic palindrome and just feels bad to say and sounds worse. Which is appropriate but like Ancapman. NAPtain Ancap would be at least sorta clever and give him a characteristic.

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 8 months ago (3 children)

What is the woke death? The fascist progrom?

[–] [email protected] 38 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Famous antifascist sniper, the Woke Death

[–] [email protected] 41 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

Hideo Kojima? hOw? i tHoUgHt yOu wErEn't PoLiTiCaL? nOw yOu pArTiCiPaTe iN dA cUlTuRe wAr? oooaaaaaaauhhh

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago

The female chaos dragon.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

When you wake up dead.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago

Car parked on the side of the road will be getting a Netflix stand up special soon

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago (1 children)

He just wants truck-kun to send him back to the isekai he thought he was in during the coma

[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)

He is lucid dreaming about that cum milking contraption

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Why do so many people like this guy, again?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago

They have very messy rooms.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

He told me I was a very strong lobster.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

There's a theory that fascists have severely stunted paychosexual development, so they need a strong daddy figure to tell them what to do. Jordan Peterson fulfils the role of surrogate father for some internet losers.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 8 months ago

"Woke death" sound so much more elegant using the French term: "la petit mort"

[–] [email protected] 32 points 8 months ago

He's more benzo than man now.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Given how the dude put himself into a coma, that technically checks, I guess.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

It's woke to be awake

[–] [email protected] 28 points 8 months ago

peterson-pain "Damn people being so Woke! It's not fair! They're far too alert for me to run them over"

[–] [email protected] 28 points 8 months ago

Capitalism is so innovative that it managed to create the world's only fascist mode of transportation - the car.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 8 months ago

JP has been an oil shill for years now. It’s no surprise he’s also big into the pro-car conspiracy theories

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

Amazon is recommending this dog brain as a “top educational podcast”

[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago

Not getting killed by cars is woke, and so is reporting on pepple not being killed by cars. But the woke death will soon visit them? So if you don't get killed by cars, you'll die from woke? This is obviously the smartest man ever

[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Does this peterson guy know that the AP is the core of the empire's propaganda machine?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago

Does this peterson guy know

Don't even have to finish the question.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

What's he even mad at here? Limiting street parking is woke? Why? How? I genuinely don't understand this. It's like seeing a story about changing sewer layout design or something and getting upset about it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago

Cars = freedom

Woke = not freedom

Limiting parking = limiting cars = limiting freedom

Limiting freedom = woke

theory-gary

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago

do people even look at his tweets? how many likes did this get

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

One of the most interesting thinkers of this century no doubt

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

The god of irony and hubris could do something extremely funny right now with Peterson but chooses not to

Do they want r/atheism to win?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

His brain is just so damn powerful hnngggnnnn

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I have become woke death, destroyer of parking spots.

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