chapotraphouse

It's actually a piece of asphalt from a collapsed bridge.

Sandstone that has an aesthetic of solidarity but will ultimately collapse from the smallest pushback or the passage of time.

Or

And upon discovering it, the apes learn how to spread super-imperialism

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/generalelection/ed-miliband-unveils-stone-carved-with-labour-pledges-to-be-placed-at-downing-st-if-he-wins-10221946.html

Hillary Cube

the rosetta stone but all sides translate to "it's her turn." over and over

limestone, no?

It's the vault where property rights are stored, but only if they're interfaced with the British lineage of property

petrified funko pops.

Rubber

"It molds into to the correct shape!"

"It molds into to any shape!"

The weeping, bloody head of Robespierre, eternally crushed by the weight of his successor's cowardice.