this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2024
309 points (95.8% liked)

Greentext

4293 readers
473 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 185 points 9 months ago (5 children)

would be cool if inertia wasn't a thing

[–] [email protected] 133 points 9 months ago (2 children)

People have a terrible understanding of orbital mechanics and apparent weightlessness. It's not like gravity just stops affecting you after you get out of the atmosphere. Getting out of the atmosphere is the easy part of getting to orbit. Going sideways fast enough is the hard part.

[–] [email protected] 85 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I feel like everyone should play KSP, just to get a taste of it

[–] [email protected] 103 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

I used to baby sit a friend's kid when he was a wee lad, frankly we spent most time playing KSP. Used to give him challenges like if he could build a ship using x amount of parts and make orbit would let him order out pizza instead of food his mom prepared for us. He rarely succeeded at first but apparently kept at it long after I stopped mentoring him and apparently is now going to school to be an aerospace engineer. And before all that his mom could never get him to do his math homework as a tyke.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Pizza has a strange powers over humans. Good job friend.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The real friends is the pizza we make along the way.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

Definitely not all those kerbals stranded on Duna. He never did figure out how to properly make it there and back

[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago

What a great origin story

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Nothing got me working on math quite like trying to figure out my ship's ∆v back in 2014 before I installed Kerbal Engineer

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

That's where I learned about it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Watching the trajectory change as you accelerate is so satisfying...

[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago

what? are you telling me I couldn't reach the other side of the planet by jumping for 12h ?

[–] [email protected] 30 points 9 months ago

Also, wind.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

Anon's airship has inertial dampeners. Checkmate, atheists.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

That's easy, instead of accelerating towards your destination you just have to brake and stop moving to let the earth move under you, checkmate physics

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 109 points 9 months ago (7 children)

This is dumb as shit. Hot air balloons only go so high, less than 70k feet according to records. They only stay aloft if the heat is continually applied, if not, air cools and they sink. They move with the air, and the air moves with the planet.

This doesn’t work for the same reason jumping in an airplane doesn’t slam you into the back wall.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 9 months ago

I don't think it was posted because it was brilliant…

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Ok but they're going really really high up

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

If you go much higher the balloon will leak heat through black body radiation faster than you'll be able to heat it. And even if you insulated the balloon in a way that didn't add too much weight you'd eventually get to the top of the atmosphere and hot air balloons won't go into space because they don't have any propulsion systems.

If you fill it with helium, it will go into space, and then it will immediately explode.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Yeah, but anon smart, u dumb. Checkmate.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Balloons using hydrogen can reach 33 miles. But even then the atmosphere still moves with the ground.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 72 points 9 months ago

This is just playing into the hands of big basket.

[–] [email protected] 71 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I hope troll logic makes a comeback

[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago

ikr they forgor to say "Problem?"

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

I hope so too, given how many people are taking this seriously.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago
[–] [email protected] 33 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Missed opportunity there: get more seats installed or attach the balloon to a bus or something, I don't know - and whenever the earth below rotates to where your destination is, just yeet yourself out Felix Baumgartner style.

More people means more profit and fewer busloon trips needed, meaning the eco footprint is smaller and you'll get a Christmas card off a random polar bear/penguin thanking you your service.

The only minor inconvenience I can think of is that your parachute effectively takes up your carry-on luggage allowance so you'll have to pay to check anything that doesn't fit in your pockets, but other than that I think you're good to go

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget to thank the busdriver

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

I think in a balloon bus, it's a balldriver

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

attach the balloon to a bus

Yo boys we're going on the battle bus (sorry for my terrible joke, it just reminded me that I'm fucking old because this was popular like 6 years ago)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

just yeet yourself out Felix Baumgartner style.

this would be so awesome. i'd spend the whole time trying to come up with something clever to say, right before the yeeting.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I’m not a rocket surgeon, but I think the amount of energy required to reach orbit is higher than what a jet would use.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Nah, weather balloons can get really really high. The problem here is, the atmosphere doesn’t “end” it just gets thinner and thinner. You would still spin with the earth, just a bit slower.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Okay so then like, 14 hours.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I think it would probably be more like several days.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Op homie invented space travel

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

The problem here has almost nothing to do with the atmosphere and nearly everything to do with the massive amount of energy required to cancel out the inertia of already moving at about 1000MPH radially relative to the center of the earth, assuming anon launches his magic balloon from the equator. The kind of energy that takes, oh IDK, a fucking rocket.

In other words, if you could actually float above the atmosphere somehow, you wouldn't just stop relative to the surface of the planet because it's not the air current that carries you along, but the fact that you started off moving along with the earth's rotation and did nothing to slow down.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (2 children)

And winds aloft are often going much much faster than on the ground.

And temps, youd have to do a lot to keep warm.

And pressurization, at ~60k ft your blood boils.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago

That’s how you make your money! Sell them suits!

The suits don’t have to work. The customer won’t complain either way.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Not exactly brain science is it.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago

Your move, globe heads.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (3 children)

That does not answer the question. The balloon is not going to orbit, high atmospheric balloons exist and do not require propulsion.

The reason it won't work is because the atmosphere is coupled to the ground and rotates with the ground.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Conservation of momentum.

You don't suddenly stop moving with the Earth just because you're no longer standing on terra firma. Like, if you throw a ball it doesn't just suddenly fall straight to the ground once it leaves your hand.

Plus, in a hot air balloon you're still in the atmosphere... Which is also moving. But even if you were in the total vacuum of space, the above applies and you still wouldn't remain stationary without actively countering the momentum you already have. And then you'd just be pulled in by gravity, unless you actively counter that too. And all that countering of forces is way more costly with fuel than simply accounting for the fact you're already moving at super high speeds along with the rotation of the planet.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

What if instead of doing this we built a really tall pole and shot people up it on a motorized basket and then clamped it at the top so we could save fuel?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Going from the US to Japan or China by hot air balloon would mean going the long way over Europe due to the jet stream, this would take more than 12h.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

If they don't understand gravity, I suspect the jet stream will be harder to grasp

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I think he'd run out of oxygen that high up wouldn't he? Or it would get too cold for the balloon to stay inflated if he didn't freeze to death first? Also, is a hot air balloon even capable of lifting a 500lb man-child that high? Would there even be room for his mobility scooter, his snacks and his high performance gaming PC?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

The density of the air becomes so thin that I don't think you could have a container for enough hot air that wouldn't weigh more than the lift provided. Helium weather balloons end up getting so large because of the pressure difference that they end up bursting at those altitudes.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›