this post was submitted on 17 Dec 2023
620 points (95.3% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 175 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don't feel the need to post my life online... Continues to post personal story online

[–] [email protected] 146 points 10 months ago

The difference is ~~it's fake~~ the anonymity.

[–] [email protected] 124 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Doesn't live online --->>> posts on 4chan

[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

never felt like I needed to post my life for the whole world to see

As he posts a story from his life 🙄

Dude is so oblivious and arrogant. He barely knows her and is already judging, thankfully smart girl saw the signs and dodged a bullet. It's rare for greentext to have a happy ending.

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 10 months ago (12 children)

NGL if you have a flip phone now, you're either a contract killer, a drug dealer and or a stage 5 weirdo.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago (3 children)

This is just judgemental and stupid. If you are easily distracted not using a smartphone outside business hours is hugely beneficial.

I use a lumia 550, but REALLY I would prefer an old school phone like the w800i, but a good k750/w800/k800 is rare and expensive at this point and pretty likely to fail. (I have 2g here). So the lumia it is.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

Friend of mine bought her first smart phone about a year ago. She just didn't need any of the functions on a smartphone and was happier with her flip phone: pretty much infinite battery, near indestructible, does communicate just ok.

Only reason she bought a smart phone is to download some group chat clients. Since she broke up with her BF, we additionally had to write her on SMS. So she made it a bit easier for us.

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 10 months ago (1 children)

loner, but not autistic or ugly so I get invited out pretty often

Oof. This hurt to read

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 10 months ago (16 children)

I know this is likely fake, but I have gotten that reaction from people. Folks really find it strange when you don't have social media. The times it really sucks is when they think you're lying and just don't want to add them.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 10 months ago (1 children)

you have xmpp? -no...

Matrix, Briar, SimpleX? -no

gotta have Email at least? ... ... no 🧐

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago (4 children)

If you don’t have lemmy nobody will fuck you.

[–] [email protected] 95 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Her: "What's Lemmy?"

Me: "It's like if 500 nerds emulated the Reddit experience of 2011."

Her: (visibly drying)

[–] [email protected] 21 points 10 months ago

"It's like if 500 nerds emulated the Reddit experience of 2011."

Now we just need Woody Harrelson in here talking about Rampart.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Her: (visibly drying)

Ben Shapiro intensifies.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Redditor? Forever virgin.

Lemming? Sex machine.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 10 months ago

Being on 4chan a wayyy bigger red flag than using a flip phone most of the time.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Of course, I imagine he pulled the phone out and opened it in one smooth motion.

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[–] [email protected] 41 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (16 children)

I am terminally online and even I don't want to engage with someone I know IRL through social media. We don't need to be on discord or Instagram or Reddit to talk 1 on 1. We can just fucking text. Like on the phone. No, I don't want to download Kik or whatsapp or any other random, sketchy app. We can text through the phone.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (5 children)

Fuck texting like a Neanderthal. Use a modern, and secure app to communicate. WhatsApp as a bottom of the barrel thing (99% of society outside of the US is on it, so it's the de facto standard) , signal or better if you can.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 10 months ago (18 children)

Nothing makes me smirk like the rest of the world bragging to Americans that they use Facebook to text. Yeah guys, you nailed it. Big win. We’re over here using standard protocols like rubes. I’m sure you get all kinds of security from that free app from Mr Zuckerberg. lol

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Shes gonna think you're handing her a burner phone dude lmao

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

If someone pulls out a flip phone I'm just going to assume they're a drug dealer

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Ive missed out on job opportunities because i dont keep any socials. There have been a couple companies ive applied to that i got a callback from after the interviews where they basically said my lack of online presence was a red flag for them. Like wtf does it matter if i use facebook or linkden or whatever? I get that it helps them get a feel for the candidate before hiring them, but still...

[–] Flyingostrich 19 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Funny thing is, some places love when people Dont have social media. I have had to go thrugh a lot of background checks for my jobs before and most of the time they are happy to hear that there is no social media for me to say dumb stuff on online.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 10 months ago (4 children)

If you don't like social media, why would you pretend to like social media to attract someone else who REALLY REALLY cares about social media? It's bound to fail.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago

Always lead with "I don't have any social media."

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago

A drug dealers flip phone. Lol

[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago (7 children)

Hey I want to look at 4chan stuff like this but not get flashed with porn, any tips?

[–] [email protected] 56 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Stick to communities like this that screencap the good bits so you don’t have to sort through the crap.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago (2 children)

This is why I keep a Bare-bones instagram account,despite not using social media.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Lemmy is it for me. Oh and a discord server with my gaming buddies. The rest of it just feels pretty gross.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)

This just makes me even happier that I've been with my (now) wife since sophomore year of highschool so I don't have to deal with this mess of a dating environment

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Folks wanna know what they're getting into. Your social media feeds are an easy indicator. Your twitter all retweets of Andrew Tate? Facebook filled with pics of you dressed up like a leather dog? Truth social? Concerning for many women.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (5 children)
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