Asklemmy

The pocket of air that was where you teleported now get displaced at a very decent fraction of the speed of light while the pocket of space you once ocupied becomes a almost pure vaccum. the air moves so fast it creates a sonic boom that ruptures the ear drums. Then, a few atoms of air collide together with such incredible force the atoms split and causes a small grade nuclear explosion.

I'm pooping next to my toilet, inside this wall. The tp roll is in my belly.

I have simultaneously merged with my desk. My bowels have been displaced and are now bisected with bamboo. I feel simultaneously ripped apart and yet stuck and solid. Every point of my being is as though it has been engulfed in flames. My existence and identity has now become insufferable pain. I feel an impending sense of doom at a foreign body now lodged inside of me.

There are no wounds for me to bleed from and I cannot gasp for air to scream. My spinal cord has been severed and I feel hot prickles on my cheeks and my ears feel as though they are being stuffed with cotton. An internal white hot pressure feeling erupts up my now-fractured spine until it reaches the back of my head and radiates towards my forehead. My peripheral vision looks like static and everything appears to shake. I am unable to make sense of anything and everything goes dark and still.

U killed me op wow

welp, I'm not sitting on a tram anymore

I'm now having an uncomfortable moment with the airline passenger in seat 26A.

I continue pooping in the next stall over.

I'm shitting in the shower.

I'm now shitting in my bathtub....

I am now shitting in the sink.

I move into a space occupied by my desk, thus taking 3d10 force damage before moving to the next unoccupied space.

Inside my boyfriend, for once.

I’m now in the lap of the guy in the stall next to me.

Does the cat on my tummy come with me? If not Cheddar says that this expirement violates the cat sitting treaty of 1669

I've now telefragged my colleague.

I am now sitting on the wing of a plane that is about to take off. Gonna try to Tom Cruise it. Will post updates soon.

I'm sitting on the floor on my balcony with my back against the wall, so I'll be falling 23 floors.

I telefrag the guy sitting next to me on the train

I'm reading this while laying on my right side in my bed. So I suppose I bounce on the bed then. Seems fun!

Fall out of my chair, but otherwise unaffected as I end up on the floor.

Well now I'm sitting in a different chair. And I don't like that chair as much. 😡

Don't know, I don't know how much two feet is.

I am now sitting in the chair next to me. This is mildly inconvenient.

Still sitting on my couch

I'm now pooping on the floor. Thanks.

I'm standing in a box. I am now a cat.

I hover briefly in the air, next to my bed, and hold up a sign that says "uh oh" before I fall a couple feet to the ground onto carpet. I might hit my head on the nightstand, but I feel like I got off easy compared to most other people.

Hmm, well the railing of my bed would well... be railing me.

I'm sitting on top of the bin of laundry I need to fold.

I'm suddenly on the outside of a bus on the motorway. Probably dead or at least badly injured.

hovers in air next to sofa, looks down, looks at camera, holds up sign saying "uh oh" and plummets two feet to the floor creating a puff of dust on impact

Whose left? Mine?

I’ll have a window seat at 30k feet and the person seated to my left will be free fallin’ for a while.

Taking a crap in the hallway

Not much, I'm just lying on the other side of the bed. Although my pillow has been replaced with a garbage bag.

Woah, lemmy is for shiters.

Thanks, I'm now pooping in the shower ...

I have been bisected by a table

i just fell off the bed ouch