this post was submitted on 24 Jan 2024
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egg_irl — Memes about being trans people in denial and other eggy topics

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!egg_irl

!egg_irl is for widely relatable memes about questioning one's gender or being an egg (a trans person in denial) as well as other eggy topics.

If you are looking for a place to discuss something specific to you or especially if you need help or are in crisis, we have communities and resources that can support you linked at the bottom of this sidebar.

General Rules:

  1. No bigotry.

  2. No spam, bots, or vote farming.

Rules on Content:

  1. No reposts.

  2. No personal-life posts, bingo cards, quizzes, selfies, "trans/not trans" lists, picrew, or non-memes.

  3. No visible names or usernames.

  4. Do not post or link to pornography.

Rules on Post Titles and Tags:

  1. Posts must be titled "egg_irl". An emoji or two is OK, but they have to be between "egg" and "irl".

  2. Posts that assume the viewer's gender and/or contain potentially triggering content must be spoilered and tagged at the beginning of the post title. Example content-warning tags that you can copy include the following:

    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Transmasc]
    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Transfem]
    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Nonbinary]
    • [CW: Transphobia]
    • [CW: Violence]
    • [CW: Weapons/Firearms]
    • [CW: Disturbing Imagery]

  3. You may optionally include other tags, such as:

    • [Transmasc Meme]
    • [Transfem Meme]
    • [Nonbinary Meme]
    • [Gender-Nonspecific Meme]

Rules on Post Text:

  1. If possible, include an image description for accessibility.

  2. Add sources for art.

Rules on Comments

  1. If a post is tagged with a specific gender identity, keep the conversation centered on that identity.

  2. You must follow the Egg Prime Directive. You may not push or coerce people into identifying or not identifying a certain way. You must respect them as the gender they claim to identify as. In addition it is extremely in poor taste to make assumptions about other people's identities based on external factors, we understand it cannot be helped but it is best not to as it can affect the way you treat others in noticeable ways.

Recommendations:

We strongly encourage you to include your pronouns in your account bio so that others know how to refer to you without misgendering you. If you're questioning or unsure of your pronouns, that's totally cool—just say so.

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egg_irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

IMO It is not possible to fake gender identity, for that there would need to be provisions to selectively invalidate people for how they claim to identify. This is not compatible with the idea that the way people identify as being valid, because it introduces scenarios where you can override this and say they aren't valid.

On the opposite side of the spectrum this also means that it is disgustingly unethical to try and call people out as being "in-denial" or an "egg" for their violations against gender norms, that would be going against their stated identity and invalidating it.

If the idea that gender identity is valid and should be respected holds true these points of invalidation are just as wrong or hurtful as any form of invalidation, and such cannot be justified, a person isn't "pretending to be [gender]" nor are they an "egg", what they say is final until they say otherwise, and that is how it should be, because if people can be invalidated in these situation, they can be invalidated in others by making it seem like they are these situations. This already happens by people saying trans people are faking it, or by saying fem presenting transmascs and enbies are really girls in denial.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

To add on, there's a really messed up study where a doctor tried to instill a gender identity to a child where it was incongruent the child's gender identity and it did not work whatsoever.

You know who and what you are internally, despite social gaslighting and conditioning trying to tell you otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Yeah I remember seeing a documentary about that, it's very sad and messed up.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

That's quite interesting in an awful way. Do you remember any details like the name of the documentary or of who did that?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

The Doctor's name was John Money, he was a Sexologist working at the Kinsey institute, the boy's name was David Reimer. David's parents went to see Dr. Money after a botched circumcision who decided to use that situation to test his theory of nature vs nurture (he believed that Gender identity was maluable when people are young) and had them reassign David as a girl, and said it was key that David never be told he was born a boy. Yeah pretty fucked up stuff.

If you want to see it yourself the documentary was BBC Horizon, episode was called "The Boy who was Turned into a Girl", it has not aged well, they use the word "Transsexual" in it to describe trans women.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I wish I was as certain in my identity as you're implying is normal. I'm also autistic, so that might be why I struggle with it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I think being uncertain is as normal as being certain. The message I was trying to get across however is that it's an internal process and nobody can tell you you're wrong. Obviously there is an internal struggle as well because identity is something so inherent to the human experience that when your identity is challenged in a serious way, there's going to be some level of dissonance.

Struggling is fine. You're not abnormal, I promise. It's just a process because questioning your own identity means you're going against the social expectation of 'normality'. Despite being on HRT myself, and 'coming out' to myself internally years before starting my transition, I still find myself having those thoughts of self-doubt.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Well I started HRT yesterday, so let's hope that makes me happy!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Congrats! Hope everything goes great for you! Just remember: it's a marathon, not a sprint.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It did

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I'm going through some old posts in this community and it's too bad no one replied to this anymore.

So hereby.. I'm happy to hear it worked out for you! :)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago

Best decision of my life