this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2023
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Mainsplaining amirite? I've been told regularly to expect to meet sick people in AA. I'm sober, I'm not a fucking desperate loser though. I have everything I need. I've achieved some amazing things in my life. I need to work through some issues sure, but I'm in a very good position to do because I worked life my way and set myself up to be in this position. I'm so over the gay men though in AA. Absolute pigs most of them. Then someone questions my misandry and who? A man of course. Sorry guys, we're feminists because we have to be.
I'm pretty sure I'm leaving this place too pretty soon. Subtle transphobia I'm supposed to police? That's what the mods are for right? The more we need to deal with transphobia alone, the more it harms us. Reliving traumatic events perpetuates them. Being told (by a man) not to speak my mind, cos hey, it might not be nice and I signed some oath to be all flowers and love. I was basically told by a mod not to stand up for myself, which is 100% my natural response. I understand this is supposed to be a nice fluffy space but we're all here because we lack some connection and need places to be able share what's deeper going on as well. It's just so fucking easy to dismiss female and trans issues because that's the status quo right guys? We've been vilified in the press for many years and it's getting worse and you expect me to be the person who should point it out to you? Sorry, like I said, my misandry grows. I don't want it to, but it's a natural response to being marginalised and diminished by men every damn day.
So, I'm pretty sure you're talking about me. I don't want that exchange to make you feel I dismissed you or your feelings in any way. I was not telling you not to stand up for yourself. I was saying that we don't really want people telling others to "fuck off and die". I also said that depending on context, I'd have probably sided with you even in that example, because we absolutely don't want any sort of bigotry or disrespect finding a home here, either. My response had nothing to do with my gender - nor yours for that matter.
I stand my what I said there, too: If anyone is being a jerk to you - hit that "report" button. You are valued and wanted here, and anyone being transphobic is not. It is as simple as that.
Thanks Nath, look it's not perfect here, but its so much better than everywhere else and I'm glad you took the time to write a measured response. I still don't want to have to report things which moderation can pick up, but I will. What we want we don't always get.
I stand by my feminist rant though. Seriously, men treat me awfully. Always fucking have, it's not just post transition and I've always been a feminist. I know men don't like hearing it because a lot of them are very good exceptions to the rule. But while we face misogyny almost every day, one whiff of misandry and I'm questioned about it, by a man. Women just groan usually.
Ha! That was an invitation to hit the report button. Not an instuction/command. You can and should feel free to call people out also if you prefer.
Thanks again, I truly appreciate your patience and kindness. !
You are not authorised to leave DT.
I feel like you are a DT ticket inspector of some kind, an authorised officer. Seriously though, thanks!
😘
Cool, my downvoter is also an incel.