this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2023
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How do you ask for help? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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I feel like I give help easily but I don't feel ok asking. How do you become ok with asking for help? I have no idea what conversations that include this even sound like. In my mind I come across as begging and losing connection with the person or people I ask. How can I think about this differently?

Edit: a little more context, although this applies generally I think. I recently got surgery. I have enough help at home to get by, but it would be nice I suppose if a friend wanted to help out in some way too while I recover. I'm not exactly sure what kind of help that would entail, maybe cleaning or cooking or even just visiting. But I struggle with asking for help in even "normal" circumstances, like moving, or a major project, or even just emotional support.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Three ways:

  • The softest is to ask someone else if they need help with anything and hope for a reciprocal ask.

  • The main way is to complain about something to someone with the power to fix it.

  • The third way, when I need help and it's urgent: Ask soneone who can help if they have a minute, and if they say yes, tell them what I need. Outside of my professional environment, I really try to avoid putting myself in this situation.