this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2024
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A few years ago I was in Alexandria, VA. Still jet-lagged I couldn't sleep and walked around town and came across the Ivy Hill cemetery and decided to walk through it. There I saw JD Vance digging up a corpse. He lifted the corpse out of the coffin gently and then told it about his day before he proceeded to have sexual intercourse with that corpse. I believe he is doing this regularly and that's why he is so awkward when talking to living people.
Is that story true? I think it's the media's job to figure that out.
I can corroborate this story- because while I was on the internet this morning I read about it, and given its upvotes I knew that meant that other people had also read about it, lending literal volumes of weight to it's narrative.
Usually I would call BS on a story like this but in the last minute I saw it referenced twice on the internet so it must be true because why would people lie.
In this day and age, a story is as true as you believe it to be.
That's the damnedest thing, I saw him doing that in a cemetery in NY too.
Are you sure that happened, though?
I remember seeing him setting that corpse onto a couche and then he proceeded to.fuck that couche's brains out while the corpse watched.
I fully believe all of this can be true.