this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
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Goliath predates bananas. They have no validity as a measurement in this circumstance.
Bananas were apparently first cultivated 7000 years ago, so I'm afraid, based on Biblical chronology, that Goliath post-dates the banana (which predates the creation of the universe) and thus a banana for scale is a valid measurement for his height, as it is the standard reference for scale according to science I just made up.
Fucking bananas I bet they were responsible for the creation too. Never trusted those fuckers.
TIL that both football and Oliver Smoot's fraternity pledge predate bananas.