this post was submitted on 22 May 2024
922 points (98.6% liked)
The Onion
4559 readers
1115 users here now
The Onion
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I used to be a tradie, most of them don't need them either, and unsurprisingly, there are always tradies around whining their tools got stolen from the back of their Ute.
The funny thing is that the biggest badasses I met don't drive these kinds of cars. In fact, I can't recall any guy here in Australia who has demonstrated an ounce of courage who does drive a larger ute, and its generally a reliable indicator imho that they need fashion accessories to impress people.
Also yeah, they always suck at parking. Not because they can't, but simply because they don't care
I saw a giant lifted truck the other day at Home Depot and I realized that these things only really impress pre-pubescent boys.
Ergo, the only reason to drive a giant truck like that is to attract and impress pre-pubescent boys. Can't think of any other good reason for them to exist.
I got my ears blasted by a lifted diesel truck that clearly did something to kneecap their muffler that was...excellerating from stopped in a bank branch parking lot. It was seriously louder than most semis, and significantly louder than most tractors (my father in law restores antique tractors, so I've ridden on several tractors) and could compete with a diesel train with 3 engines lashed together hauling 2 miles of freight up a grade
These and every single sports car out there.