You stand up to wipe your ass?
this post was submitted on 10 Oct 2023
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Some people sit, some people stand. Most of the time, neither side is aware of the other side’s existence, and also cannot comprehend how they manage to do it that way.
I can't even reach for the TP without the damn toilet auto-flushing and getting my balls wet with toilet water. Why the hell would I even think to try wiping while sitting down?
Because it’s harder to reach my ass standing up. Plus, I don’t want my ass cheeks to come together and smear the shit around. Sounds like the sensitivity of the units needs adjustment.
Last time the great Sit Vs Stand Debate reared its head (on the site we left behind), iirc standers were in the minority, but not by much. I don't understand the mechanics of standing to wipe.
Surely standing smooshes the buttcheeks together? Like trying to clean a window with the blinds down
It isn't a full stand, just like a squat above the toilet. Asscheeks still very much apart, ready to receive paper.
Asscheeks still very much apart, ready to receive paper
No idea why this read for me like a response to a drill sergeant.
"WHAT'S THIS, MAGGOT? ARE YOU FULLY STANDING UP TO WIPE YOUR DIRTY ASS, RECRUIT?!"
"SIR, NO SIR! ASS CHEEKS VERY MUCH APART, READY TO RECEIVE PAPER, SIR!"
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I sit so this is just a guess, but I imagine they use one hand to hold one cheek apart, and the other to wipe? Otherwise yea I feel like it would make more of a mess lol
The mysterious world of the other side of the toilet stall.... you're sat there pooing like a normal human being, meanwhile in the next stall someone is stood over their own pants, pulling their bumcheeks apart one at a time for what could only ever be a half-wipe. Strange & inefficient.
Well I'm not sure how everyone else goes about it, but I've always found it easier to stand and wipe front to back, I dunno about all that sitting down or sideways wiping stuff.
Probably helps that I'm a reasonably slender guy though, it's not difficult or messy at all for me.. 🤷♂️
sideways wiping
Excuse me?
Hahahaha. Every statement OP makes just leads to more questions.
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Gotta make sure the poo is smooth and even on each cheek before wiping.
I'm not sure if you're trying to be silly or not, but how would a person wipe their ass while sitting? Especially on a public auto-flush toilet, where even so much as reaching for the toilet paper causes the toilet to flush and get my junk wet with toilet water...
I lean to one side, which lifts one butt cheek enough to reach my ass. Keeps the butt cheeks spread apart. I’ve never had one flush before I stood up.
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Because there are a ton of jerks that don’t flush.
This was what I remember about the US restrooms before the auto-flush mechanisms came. 30-50% of the stalls in a ladies room would be unflushed and people would occasionally take their chances flushing it with their foot to get an unflushed one back in use if there was a line. Nice places had someone walk through the bathroom and flush everything, refill the paper towels and wipe down the sinks occasionally. Really nice places had people stationed in the bathroom full-time but they often expected $1-5 in tip for handing you a paper towel. Fuck, I'm only 40 but I'm old.
True enough, but can't they put the auto-flush thing on a one minute delay or so, at least give me a bit to wipe my ass first?
Common curtesy goes a long way,
Common curtesy cannot be found today,
Auto flush will take the mess away.
lean forward, it's the poor man's bidet.
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Are you saying you stand up and then wipe your ass? Like/// really? Holy shit.
Apparently about half of people do this.
Half of all people in the world squish their shit tangling on their sphincter between their ass cheeks before they wipe?
It's less than half.
There are also the people that don't wipe at all.
Truly living on the edge.
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they auto flush as soon as you stand up, knowing good and well you still gotta wipe your ass
Wait, you stand up to wipe? Why?
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Auto flushing is also not consistent -- it really depends on the toilet. I've seen some that are very good, doesn't flush until you get up, and others that are so bad they flush while you're sitting on it.
I feel like they should tie the auto flush sensor to the door hinge, since any movement there indicates no ones actively sitting on the toilet. Unless you're one of those people who refuse to the lock the door...
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You can tell this isn't Reddit because the bidet squad hasn't shown up.
LMFAO!
More sanitary not touching others poopy surfaces, and otherwise some people wouldn't flush.
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We have the opposite problem where I live. The auto-flush barely ever works, and more often than not nowadays the manual flush is a tiny button you have to actively search for to find.
Having cleaned toilets before, it's because a startling amount of people don't flush. In a high school, I'd say about half the kids from the 1980s didn't, so I can't imagine they started as adults. In companies I have worked for with auto-flushes, I have rarely seen a mess left in the bowl, but companies that don't about half the time as well.
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Back when I was a student, the auto-flush sensors on the toilets at my university were so sensitive that I could trigger an accidental flush just by leaning forward about 10°. Just the subtle variations in my normal sitting posture could sometimes trigger as many as five flushes before I even started wiping. It was so bad I started carrying a pad of post-it notes in my pocket so I could cover the sensor before sitting down.
Didn’t always work. My previous employer had them on a timer. If they thought you were taking too long, it would start flushing, then again, then more frequently. So yeah, time to stand up for a couple minutes before resuming pooping.
Actually, yet another reason for using the handicapped stall. Sorry guys, but there’s room to standup and even turn around, there’s a hook to keep anything off the floor, and it doesn’t have the timer. At some point the regular stalls became unusable
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I put a small piece of toilet paper over the sensor. Problem solved, and now I can flush at my leisure.
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Someone will smear shit over the flush handle. Either because they're an asshole or because things went horribly, horribly wrong.
As someone who saves water at home, I feel wasting a little bit in the name of me-not-having-to-deal-with-someone-else's-shit is a perfectly reasonable use.
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