AskBeehaw

A few thoughts:

• Look for a remote job?
• This one seems silly, but... care less about whether you are productive and focus on whether you are happy at work
• Have a discussion with your manager about how to mitigate the annoyances
• Also have a discussion with your manager about how to do more of the stuff you like
• Set stronger boundaries - a sign which says please do not disturb me when headphones are on for example may help to reduce small talk, if that's something you don't desire, and allows you to start/stop focus time. Talking with your coworkers about how best to interact with you like telling them that you prefer conversations start with an email thread, or a message on slack/teams/etc.

Things I like about working in an office:

• I liked my coworkers
• I liked going for random breaks to go walk somewhere or have lunch and get away from the desk

Things that sucked:

• Constant noise and distractions
• Small talk with people that I just don't want to spend the mental energy talking to
• 1.5 hours worth of commute time that just eats away at my day

I've been remote working since Covid first landed. I will happily trade all the things I liked about working in an office to never have to deal with the parts I don't like. If I can help it, I'll always choose remote work. I get so much done here at home in both work and home stuff. Oh I forgot to do laundry over the weekend, no biggie. Oh I need to marinate something, boom 10 minute break. Finished all my planned work for the day? Going to knock off early and go play a game or watch a show.

Remote work has transformed my life and I'll never go back to the office.

I did 6 months using my electrical engineering degree working for a provincial power utility. Every day felt like Office Space, and I could feel myself aging with every day. Soul crushing experience categorized by florescent lights and grey quarter cubicles.

I no longer use my electrical engineering degree and my life is much better.

Why shouldn’t work be fun? Why is there an expectation of misery in exchange for living?

I have been 100% virtual since COVID. I love not commuting but it can be very isolating. At this point I am fairly certain I may not ever work in an office again. Alot of it has to do with the people you work with. I had one job where the entire team of 13 people turned over within a year. I was the first one in on the "new team" so to speak. Being that we were all learning on the job together, and we were a unique group of humble and hard working people, we developed a bond very quickly and hung out regularly on weekends. It was like going to work with your friends everyday, and no matter how hard things got, we found a way to get through it. Best job I ever had and I had to commute an hour each way for it.

How many offices have you worked in? I've worked in 3. They've been different. I loved my first office bc I was 10 ft from the industrial tools I worked on. My second office was ok, bc there was a big window and was easy to drive to. My current office sucks bc they're not repairing the building: the carpet is old and stained, the paint is flaking off, and the gym and cafeteria are 5 miles away at the main campus. Every company is different.

You should do what you need to do to make your work environment more enjoyable for you.

• Talk more or talk less about non-work stuff with your co-workers, depending on if you like chatting and if your co-workers like chatting.
• Request a new/better chair, or get a new chair and expense it if you can. The right chair can make a real difference in how comfortable you feel at work.
• Stand up and take 1 minute breaks on the half hour to hour, to clear/refresh your head and stretch. People in decades prior took smoke breaks all the freaking time.
• Wear comfier clothes within the dress code: Stretchier stuff, comfortable belts, womens fashion I don't have experience with so I can't offer anything helpful.
• If it's too cold, wear another t-shirt or under garment (or 2 if it's freezing) under your shirt/dress. If it's too hot get a fan and/or short sleeve dress shirt.
• Request another monitor from IT. For me, it makes work a lot easier because going between screen was extremely annoying to me.
• Bring your own keyboard, mouse and earbuds (with your manager's permission). Maybe try to avoid clicky (blue) switches, but more focus on what's ergonomic and comfortable for you.
• Add a tasteful trinket or two of stuff you find interesting to your desk. Like photos or mini figurines.
• Get permission to WFH for a portion of the week.
• If your manager is annoying, try to negotiate, otherwise move to another division or get a new job. That can't be fixed easily.

Finding a WFH gig seems the best route. If that's not possible in your field then go and be a field tech, and get the field experience while you're young. I know geotechs have drilling and CPT testing programs that can keep you very busy

WFH Pros:

I get more sleep now

you can poop in your own toilet and use nice toilet paper.

See your family and pets more

A more comfortable environment

You can see natural light (i think this has helped me a lot. It was really stressful living in darkness all the time. I have no idea how night shift workers stay alive.)

Woah colors all around you

Save money and sanity as you don't have to commute

WFH cons

If you value face to face interactions then that might be difficult

You might need to invest in some equipment

Some people find it hard to work where they live/sleep as they have a hard time separating work and relaxation spaces.

Some places could expect more work from you and think that if you're at home you can work anytime.

Edit: i cut out my personal experience. To sum it up I found working in an office absolutely miserable and isolating. Often I didn't get to see the sun or would only see the beginning of the sunrise for a few minutes during my commute.

From your post and your comments, it sounds like your work environment isn't comfortable. The other topic I was expecting was that you didn't find job satisfaction, but you didn't say that at all.

Comfort in the workplace is something many women struggle with and working from home was liberating. If the temperature is wrong, or your seating isn't comfortable or you don't feel like you can take appropriate length breaks at the office, these are classic problems that need reform in the office. Humans aren't built to sit and make small movements on a keyboard and mouse all day, it breaks you.

I encourage you to look into work reform and workers rights. You aren't alone on this. Don't buy into the "work isn't supposed to be fun" thing. Work should. Matter and you should want to work, if you don't, that is the fault of the employer, not you. I worked stupid jobs and was abused by the system for 8 years before I was able to find a tolerable place, I'm still recovering years later from frustration and burnout.

Bullshit jobs by David Graeber is a great read.

Retire. I know flippant. Seriously though anything you do over 40 hours a week outside of sleeping is not going to be fun. Also 90% are the same in the sense that you spend 50% or more of your time not doing the particular stuff you like but instead going to meetings, doing required training, fitting your stuff into required methodology. Tracking and documenting things. WFH does help a lot. I take a one hour lunch pretty much every day and walk my dog along with prep and eat a nice meal. I find when I have a block of time its much easier to completely focus on my work compared to in office. Then of course you also don't have the annoying commute. That really makes a difference in quality of life while working.

Why shouldn’t work be fun? Why is there an expectation of misery in exchange for living?

I'd suggest asking your employer if you can get some kind of flexible schedule agreement. For me, working in the office was never about the office itself, but the hours. The M-F 9-5 is a life-sucking drain that I never learned to tolerate in all my 30+ years of full-on adulting.

Once though, I worked a cubicle job where due to the nature of the work, I was able to work all my 40 hours in just 4 days per week and one of those days was only a half day. That consolidation of my personal time was enough to make me not loathe going in to work everyday.

If it's possible for you to work four 10-hr shifts or maybe work less than 40 hrs / week, it might make a difference in how you feel

What type of engineer?

If you’re a software engineer, then you can probably start to look around for remote work. You will also have the luxury of looking at tech companies that also have nice offices and campuses that aren’t soul sucking cubicles.

"They subsidize lower prices by paying employees less," he says. "If you aren't tipping, you are taking advantage of that labor."

The prices aren't lower, though. They charge just as much as the rest of the western world, yet pay their workers less, and expect customers to pay even more to make up the cost the employer is evading.

The only person taking advantage is the employer. The customer is being screwed, the worker is being screwed, all to pad the employer's pocket. And yet the system pits the customer and the employee against one another.

What field are you in? Anything automotive is going to be a suckfest. Also, many people treat younger people like shit for no reason. I would look for a new job.

The effect of the work environment should not be underestimated. I’d recommend to start by trying to pinpoint exactly what makes you miserable. Do you feel like you don’t have enough personal space to focus? Is it the lack of natural light? Is your setup not ergonomic enough? Does it feel too impersonal or dull? Then either you try and start a positive conversation about potential solutions inside you current org, or you look elsewhere for what you need. It really sounds like it’s achievable to obtain what you’re looking for without a drastic career change.

Personally, now I’m happily remote and I’ll never go back if I can help it, but before the pandemic I was at an office and I’d always insist on having natural light. Honestly I just wilt and die if I don’t have a window.

I always really enjoyed working from the lab instead of my desk when I had to work in an office. It started since I had to reference things in there but I just enjoyed it. I didn't have a nicer chair but I felt more comfortable there. I don't know if you have something like that but I loved it.