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submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 77 points 11 months ago

The 90s are nothing. I remember a flock of seagulls from the 80s that are still flying around.

[-] [email protected] 29 points 11 months ago

They just flew (so far away).

[-] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Hello, fellow old people. My 10 year old is sporting that cut, unironicaly.

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[-] [email protected] 62 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Any bird who lives primarily in the water is dumb as shit. They have unlimited protection above and around them, so they have zero adaptive pressure to put anything into their intelligence. Land birds have a lot to worry about so their brains are approaching human levels of intellect.

[-] [email protected] 51 points 11 months ago

If the land birds get any smarter they're going to have to start worrying about a whole lot more. Like taxes, or rent.

[-] [email protected] 31 points 11 months ago

I mean some birds have been shown exchanging money for goods and services, so it's not that far off.

[-] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago

Oh god no, someone needs to warn the birds about capitalism.

[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

Birds are very good at stealing things, so I think it's too late for that

[-] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

Stealing requires the belief that other people can own things. They are simply taking what is rightfully theirs. Birds are billionaires.

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[-] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

A land bird flew into my window so hard I was worried it died this morning. This happens once a month to my knowledge and I don’t spend long in my bedroom outside sleeping. Land birds aren’t smart outside of a few select species lol

[-] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

In all seriousness that's more of a sensory limitation than an intelligence limitation. IIRC birds' eyes work differently from mammals and they can't see glass pretty much at all.

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

Put some stickers on your window

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Wtf. Would you please do something about that?

[-] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

What do you want him to do, start a bird college?

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

Not true at all. There's tons of adaptive pressure. If there weren't, we wouldn't see the thousands of pelagic and shorebird species that we do. But even if what you say about the threat from predation were true --its not-- there would still be adaptive pressure from differential reproduction rates and access to nutrients.

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[-] [email protected] 40 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I’m sure there’s some seagull out there with a 1000-yard stare who went through the most fucked up shit of his life in the 90’s and still remembers it like it was yesterday. He hangs out down by the bars and drinks discarded alcohol out of the trash, trying to forget, and then flies around drunk bumping into things.

The other seagulls look at him and shake their heads with pity “he used to be such a good gull.. so full of promise.”

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[-] [email protected] 32 points 11 months ago

This reminds me of a talk I had with my dad, an equine veterinarian for 40 years. I'd seen that video of a horse eating a chick online and someone in the comments explained that horses are naturally opportunistic eaters and that's why it took the chance to munch it down. I confidently told him this later on and he said, 'nah, they're just stupid'.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago
[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

Are they stupid or do they know that death is just a dark void?

[-] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago

Got me wondering weather or not horses actually know something we don't. They always had shifty eyes.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

Someone on youtube said it therefore it must be true. I believe it.

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[-] [email protected] 31 points 11 months ago

I don't know that I'd trust an ornathologist to know how the brain chemistry works. But I do trust that they're dumb. Lacking memory isn't predictive of being dumb, but there's probably some correlation. Maybe seagulls have perfect memory but just want to flip human observers the bird.

[-] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago

Ornithologists do actual science, they aren't just bird watchers. An ornithologist is pretty much the only one I would trust about this because they are the ones studying the birds.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

That and the bird lawyers.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

Idk bird lawyers probably don’t deal with birds at their smartest. Human lawyers likely don’t think we’re intelligent life either

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Idk man, I wouldn't trust those guys. I think some of them are being paid off by the government to defend the position that birds are real. Crazy stuff, I know.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

Maybe seagulls have perfect memory but just want to flip human observers the bird.

My spirit animal

[-] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago

Wait till this person hears about parrots

[-] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago

For real, there are at least some parrots that are likely to outlive their owners. Like if you get a pet parrot you do it considering you will likely pass it on to someone else in your fucking will.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

The sadder part of this is that many "pet" parrots live much shorter than their natural life in the wild because their owners don't know how to care for them. They're also extremely intelligent, some researchers argue that macaws can be considered sapient for example.

Even more widespread problem with koi and goldfish. They can live well into their 80s and can grow up to many pounds over that time, yet most people have their goldfish die after two weeks and just assume that's their natural lifespan because they're irresponsible owners. Hint: that glass bowl is not cutting it, there isn't a single species of fish that can be healthy in a tank without an active circulation pump and filter. Also fun fact: the Western misconception that goldfish can be kept in bowls comes from the fact that in China and Japan where they originate, owners would sometimes put them in clay bowls to show them off (which were about a meter in diameter BTW, not the soccer ball sized bowls you see nowadays), they were kept in those bowls very rarely, they were traditionally raised in large ponds.

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Or crows, they reach roughly the same age and ravens can turn fucking 80 in captivity, not sure how long they live in the wild tho!

[-] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago

They wait for cruise ships to leave to grab fish trying to swim away. They're probably smarter than most people.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

Based on the 2020 US election, we know at least 74,222,958 people that fall under the seagull intelligence standard.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

Not a single seagull voted for Trump. Not one. How do libs explain this, other than by voter suppression?

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[-] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

Not a especially high bar!

[-] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago

They have enough thought process to play. Watch them fly. They play in the thermals. Do all manner of aerobatics. They know how to steal from humans. That's not "dumb".

[-] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago

I think a lot of birds have more complex internal lives than people realize. I have chickens, amd all four of them have a distinct personality and feelings.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

No kidding. My yard has had more chickens than I can count over the years. Every one an individual.

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

"The greatest trick the devil ever played was making man believe he doesn't exist"

Those seagulls remember... and they'll have their revenge for that hot dog bun you scared them off in 04'. tick tok

[-] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Since there is videos of seagulls hunting pigeons i'd say they are pretty smart birds. They just dont give a fuck to pretend around people.

[-] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago

Just because an animal is territorial and good at killing does not mean it's smart.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

Yes but we already know about cops.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

The approach is pretty smart though and it isnt standard seagull behaviour, so they are inventive. Also they are about the same size as pigeons.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xRPTBhmcyXY

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

I don’t remember the 90s either.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

“You’re dumb”

-He

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this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2023
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