this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
243 points (95.2% liked)

Funny

6758 readers
194 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 44 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 1 points 18 hours ago

Refuse if she offers a handjob

[–] [email protected] 67 points 2 days ago

Seems like a good knight out.

[–] [email protected] 61 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Naughty jokes aside, I would love that, laugh my ass off, and look forward to an amazing date.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago

Clearly, I'd put on my robe and wizard hat.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Going on a quest? Fuck yeah

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Nope. Going ice skating and then out for sushi.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago

Close enough.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Wearing a full suit of armor, accomplishing either IS quite the quest 😄

[–] [email protected] 34 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I challenge her to a duel. If I win, I gain her hand in marriage. If she wins... I suppose I would have to give her my hand in marriage.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

Win - Win sort of plan you have.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

I see what you did there

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago

I put on my robe and wizard hat. If the date goes well, maybe I'll show her my wand of magic missile.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago

Finally I could say "m'lady" without shame.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Break out some coconuts and become her faithful steed.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

He have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join his court at Camelot.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

Somebody call the locksmith!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago

Bras are bad enough, now I have to learn how to take off a hauberk?

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 days ago

Pledge fealty and marry her immediately

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Ok if you are wearing that then I'm wearing a wig, corset and big puffy dress.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

gotta one-up her in masculinity, make sure the frills are at least twice the size of yourself, and the shoes pointy enough to inflict stab wounds.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

Make sure the pageboys are still around, cause getting in that mail is gonna be a team effort.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

Hope she Lays on Hands me

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Invite her back to my place for some jousting.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

If it wasn't the plan already, changing them to Medieval Times.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

Oh... So I guess I can pass for a Wizard...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Jolly cooperation is what I'd do

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Drive to Constantinople, to party like it's 1204

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

"Lo, see ye her, all gleamin' in her plate, like some manner of queen, sittin' high in her gilded carriage, thinkin' herself bettr' than us 'cause of her fine metal and steed of silver."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

What a Dame!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (4 children)

Taking off that chainmail will rip half of her hair off. If that's your thing...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

She should be okay if she's wearing one of those hair things underneath. I forget what they're called. It bunches up your hair like a shower cap and keeps your hair from getting in the armor

Edit: the girl here is not wearing one it seems though

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

It's called a coif. They also serve a critical part in terms of shock absorption.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

Why would she ever take that off?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Thats a kind of a turnoff

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Typically a person wears a cap of some sort under the chainmail so that hair doesn't get entangled.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Too much makeup ! Deal breaker.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Definitely pretty pointy elbows