this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2024
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Facepalm

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[–] [email protected] 105 points 2 months ago (4 children)

When you hear the buzzer, stare at the art. You should now feel mentally invigorated.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago

If you suspect staring at art has not provided the required intellectual sustenance, reflect briefly on this classical music.

[MUSIC INTERRUPTED BY BUZZER]

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[–] [email protected] 83 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (6 children)

This looks like, and “Wellness room” sounds like, a gender neutral term for a lactation room.

The description in that Wikipedia article sounds much nicer and more elaborate than what we actually had at my last office.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Also sounds much nicer than "crying room" or "panic attack room"

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 months ago

This hangs outside at the door:

[–] [email protected] 37 points 2 months ago

That all sounded very wholesome until Wikipedia mentioned that it was instead of maternity leave...

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (11 children)

Precisely what this is, with the added benefit (to the company) of being used as a prayer room or other various employee needs.

Converting storage to these private/meditation/wellness (corporation dependant branding for them) rooms has been very common.

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

My former employer had a relaxation room that looked like this.
It was sound-proof and had a massage chair in it.

The door to the room was within direct line of sight of the boss's desk.
I tried going in there once, but the boss called me over and gave me more work.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 months ago

Your former boss is an asshole.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It was sound-proof

Ah. The Scream Closet.

but the boss called me over

Ah, the ol' Sci-Fi classic: I Have A Scream Closet, But I Cannot Scream.

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The first thing I did the moment I saw this was imagine seeing this in Portal, and hearing GLaDOS say something like "Welcome to the Aperture Science wellness room, where test subjects can de-stress after a long day of testing"

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

"Please commence relaxing."

BZZZZZT

"You should now be rejuvenated."

[–] [email protected] 39 points 2 months ago (2 children)

This is some real life Severance shit.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I might be into it though if Reileen Kawahara will come in and tell me what a good boy my Outie is.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 months ago

Severance-core

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (4 children)

im almost certain this is a breastfeeding/pumping room, but given a neutral name

Either way, it seems like a nice place to take 10 and scroll on my phone for a minute so i support it

the real question would be what sort of limitations does your employer have around it?

Ive worked at places that had ping pong tables and videogame stations in the break room but if you only get a 30min break for a 8 hour shift when are you meant to use these "happiness and welness" facilities

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago

when are you meant to use these

You aren't. They are solely there to provide a chance for HR to claim it's awesome slaving for this company, either as a hiring lie, or as a retention lie.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

I love how some forms of inclusion can be so multiple purpose.

I absolutely can believe this started as a breastfeeding room but it easily doubles as social-break room for autists/introverts.

This one even has room to pace back and forth, thats like all i am doing when i am really stressed.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

At my workplace, you really just use them whenever. I'm a developer and we are encouraged to change environments when we are stuck or working on solving a problem. Or any time you just need to recalibrate your brain for 10-15 minutes.

Obviously, you can't just sit there all day, but sometimes we like to go there when others go for a smoke break. And sometimes nothing works and everything is annoying, then you can just say: "I'm gonna take 10 and come back with fresh eyes".

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago

Place I used to work at had a room labeled "Safe Space" that I can only assume was mandated by corporate because the store manager hung a framed photo of a snowflake on the wall in it. He wasn't there for very much longer, wonder why?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The chair gives +15 comfort and the painting gives +20 inspiration and if there's at least one empty tile next to it the effect covers a 50m radius so I don't see the problem???

You pepper a few of these on every floor and as long as you don't overuse Crunch Time, this will carry you through the midgame with basically zero upkeep.

Wellness rooms are OP if anything tbh.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Hit space to talk

"um. that was a jump. you're jumping."

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Portal 2 is such a banger.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 months ago

By Terraria rules, that's a house fit for a princess

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago

Why aren't people enjoying the wellness ~~closet~~ room? I specifically requested it.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Looks like a Dwarf Fortress bedroom

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

is upset because his bedroom does not have a cabinet or a chest

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago

I used to hide in a literal storage room when i worked at walmart (I wanted to be away from all people on my breaks). At least this has a comfy chair.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago

I am an engineer that does power design for commercial spaces. These "wellness" rooms show up a lot. They are there simply so your corporate overlords can tick a little box under "workplace atmosphere" and add it to the list of bullshit features on their website no employee ever actually uses. It's very similar to "mother's rooms", only those can be considered code compliant based on your location. Sometimes they are also called "phone rooms."

I think architects upsell them into designs to boost their self esteem.

It's a lot like when old apartment buildings gut a storage room, put a few pieces of shitty gym equipment in it, and then add "on site fitness center" to the website, and also tack a small monthly fee on your rent.

If I had a dollar for every existing office space I've surveyed that ended up just piling office supplies in them, or found them covered in 3 inches of dust... I'd probably have like $100. Not a ton, but enough to definitely make them seem ridiculous.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago (2 children)

How am I supposed to jerk off in there?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago

The design is very human.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

When what you really need to relax is the comfort of white noise from the air ducts in the walls, florescent lighting and a sense that not only does time not pass, but it doesn't even exist. Enjoy your mental health liminal space, employees.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

I would non-ironically love it. Especially with a door locked from the inside. It just looks comfy and calm. Or maybe I just enjoy the ambiance of the toilets, dunno.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's a literal requirement in many commercial buildings. They're for breastfeeding in the code of many municipalities, but you can't call them booby rooms so they're "wellness rooms". A commercial space I was looking at required 2 nursing/wellness rooms because of the size. For a team of 10 dudes. Ridiculous

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

A commercial space I was looking at required 2 nursing/wellness rooms because of the size. For a team of 10 dudes.

The premise of these rules is that they apply regardless of gender, in order to avoid incentivizing an all-male office specifically to avoid regulations. Now, if you do decide your company doesn't need to be a pure sausage fest, you won't be on the hook to build out a new room specifically to accommodate someone of the opposite gender.

And, in the meantime, you've got a space to take a private phone call or pop an advil and close your eyes for a minute, if you feel the need.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

some box checker tiked a box for this.

fuck you slaves

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

That's where your wellness goes to die I believe

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

When you feel well, go there.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If you pad the walls with sound proof material and allowing people to scream and shout till their lungs burst, then it becomes a real wellness room

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

To be fair, this is the perfect room for Eustace from Courage the Cowardly Dog. It's just missing a TV and a newspaper.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

I remember this scene from Severance.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Looks like I took a wrong turn in the Stanley Parable

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

It's the existential dread room.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It’s almost complete… just need to add a camera.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Why do these rooms that are supposed to be good for your mental health always look so vapid and empty? Pure white walls and black sofas are depressing to me.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (5 children)

They help with sensory/stress/emotional overload by purposefully being understimulating. Think of them as a nice quiet and secluded place to collect your thoughts and help your mind calm down/relax.

Edit: (stupid autocorrect)

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

They don't want you to use them.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

To be fair, I'd be absolutely vibing in a room like this. Probably wouldn't help a panic attack though.

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