this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2024
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Jokes and Humor

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 4 months ago (1 children)

While clothing slides at exhilarating speed over a metal slider, sticky sweaty skin will instantly and firmly grip to it. You do NOT want to initiate thigh skin contact in the middle of a descent.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It burns it burns it burns it burns it burns Chaaarliiiiiiiieeeeee!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago

Cover that butthole, averyminya!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I have a very fond memory of my grandmother in the late 60’s and early 1970’s taking us to the playground near her house and they had one of these metal slides. We always took a roll of wax paper to tear off a piece and sit on the first few times down. After that, you could fly down this thing. Great times!!! I miss her.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

We did those shitty fundraising sales the entire 6 years I was in elementary school with the promise of more playground equipment and finally when I was in 5th grade they put up a single slide. In hindsight someone had to be skimming off the top there.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

They always are ... they're a scam and should be illegal IMO

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago (3 children)

…And right into rocks/gravel…

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Huh, interesting reading these comments. In my area it was wood chips. Splinters everywhere, jammed between toenails and fingernails, wood chips to the face, throwing wood chips in each others eyes...

It was not many years later that school playground was renovated to have the softer outdoor foam play floor

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

I think wood chips were added later (after I was out of that school) "for safety" and then rubber mulch was an even later upgrade.

And when did something soft go in the playground area? Waaaay later, the school got actual grass in the playground - instead of playground equipment. 🙄 Building was closed within a few years of that happening.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Can't beat sandpaper textured concrete.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

At least it's not slippery when wet.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

We had asphalt. Monkey bars on it, too. For first graders. So many broken arms.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

Ooh, damn that's rough!

I think we had some bars over asphalt/concrete/cement (I dunno, it was a big solid surface that was also the parking lot, the kickball diamond, the wiffle ball field, and where we had all of our field and track days) but I only ever fell off the ones over the rocks. I do remember friends with broken teeth or busted noses from that, tho.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

Kids these days can still enjoy the finer things in life.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

Fresh out? Still in!!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

Still better than the plastic slides.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

Hey, I just went down one of these last week!

It was still on a half day preheat, so it wasn't that hot.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

My family invested in a jungle-gym when I was a kid. We were lucky. The slide was wood with a thin wax coating. It lasted about one year in that region, baking in one season, swelling in another, freezing and thawing in the other two, until it became a splinter distributor and we never used it again.

For the metal slides, however, lying on a skateboard + metal slide = somehow never broke a bone.