this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2023
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[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation

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I've been really struggling to unplug my brain after a heavy week at work and I always overthink my free time, to the point where I don't know what I'd prefer to do.

What's your 'go to' way to relax or disconnect from real life?

Thanks!

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Podcasts. I have a very aural internal experience and just having someone else’s voice in my head helps a lot.

Video games. There’s so much science put into making video games an escape it’s almost like cheating. If you look at them as an engineered tool designed for escapism it’s kind of amazing.

Gardening. Takes a certain amount of privilege in space, money and patience but it hits a very deep evolutionary satisfaction.

Nature. Just get as deep into trees as you can and then sit or walk. Find a tree that you like and keep visiting it through the year. Watch how things change through the season and how it fights a fungus or feeds the birds. Connect to an ephemeral but living thing in an implicitly liminal space to disconnect from your constructed reality.

Making something. Shelves are easy. Pizza or pie is just involved enough but not too much effort. Good for iteration and practice too. Lots of people do Lego or puzzles. I enjoyed 3d printing but it’s a major time investment thats hard to maintain.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

While you were neurotypical, I studied the unwind.

While you were able-bodied, I studied the unwind.

While you developed your career, I studied the unwind.

Now you’re stressed out and have the audacity to come for advice!?!

Lmao. ASD, MCAS, 4 years disability. I’ve got lots of practice.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Working out makes me forget about anything other than the effort it takes

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

Marijuana and TV with the wife

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Running my volcano or mighty+ to dry herb vape weed. Washes the stress and bullshit of the day away.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Gardening, handwork, or DIY. Do something that uses more hands than brain. Most of that stuff, you can also watch videos or listen to podcasts.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Watching a long (ideally 30 minutes or longer) Youtube video from the few content creators I like. Things like Real Life Lore or other geography/history content

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Trying to drink a single beer or glass of scotch in between feeding my dogs, walking my dogs, scarfing down dinner, getting my 2 year old to eat something, wrangling my 2 year old into a bath and then PJs, making sure my 3 month old is taken care of, etc.

There is no rest for the weary!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Others might joke or not joke and say drugs or alcohol, but with the risks of injury in those (and I’m not really a huge fan anyways) I’ll suggest some other stuff. I really like working out in some way, hiking, kayaking, sports, or just the gym. Really helps unwind and destress. Getting on a trail and turning off your notifications really does wonders. I also game and finding a decent game isn’t always easy, but it’s easy to get lost in a game and forget about real life. Treat yourself! If you have money to go out to eat or pickup some cheapo takeout do it. You worked hard, you deserve it.

Can’t really think of anything else that I do, good luck hope something in this thread helps.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Could you recommend any of those good games?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Old school RuneScape, there’s a reason you see it’s communities being super popular. It has a ton of activities ranging from completely mindless (good for movie/video watching) to extremely engaging depending on your flavor.

It’s not out yet, but the studio has a long history of making engaging and interesting worlds, so Starfield. It’ll probably have some bugs on launch in a few days, but I trust the game will be great. This leads to the fact that any game with a good universe or story helps. So Skyrim and fallout universe games I highly recommend.

Finally I’ll suggest some typical relaxing games. People like stardew, I’m not a fan and there are many clones that do things different so that’s an option. Give slime rancher a go, it’s a super cute game that’s really just incredibly relaxing. Pokémon or any of the clones is also super relaxing.

Hope this helps!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've played Fallout 4 and slime rancher, and yeah I agree they're nice games

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I really enjoy The Long Dark in pilgrim/easy mode.

A) no other game captures walking in the woods during winter the way this one does. Brings me right back to growing up in the bush in Eastern Ontario.
B) it’s a walking/scavenging/survival game in an empty of people world. On easy mode you don’t need to worry about the predators and the survival elements are more realistic than punishing as in higher difficulties.

They’ve recently added some interior design elements so you can find an abandoned cabin and just hole up in a quiet world. It’s a really nice escape I find.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

If ya live close to the ocean, bodyboarding is a cheap sport to pick up and have a bunch of fun

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

i vape a lot of weed (all day everyday its not good habit). i used to use a funky chemical every so often that i considered to be like hitting restart for my brain but i dont use that anymore haha

i also play video games/wish i wasnt so lonely

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well maybe it's time to pick up the phone again to find out why you're lonely and that it isn't necessarily bad to be alone

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

most my friends have been shitty throughout my life so its hard for me to trust new people enough to be friends. i had a good few friends id hangout with and i was dating one of them but we broke up a month ago, and i dont really talk to them anymore, except one but i feel shitty because its my ex's friend and i feel like im inadvertendly hurting my ex which i also dont want to do.

my closest friend decided to take a gap year coz uni is stressful

so im kinda down to nobody haha. its ok tho i climb and other folks climb with me so i get my social interaction there

i dont feel comfortable just talking to people randomly i feel like theyd think im weird for randomly reaching out even tho thats prolly not true. i cant be certain.

i have a lot of anxiety n stuff lol but my ex made me have panic attacks every other day. not because of her intentions just my anxiety making me crazy. we have no bad blood tho i dont think.

apologies for venting mr(or ms) random person

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Coming from someone who used to smoke all day every day - maybe consider cutting back or quitting for a while. I found that it greatly increased my anxiety and overall made my life worse.

I still have the occasional gummy but life is much better now that I'm not a daily smoker.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

ive tried but i don't think its good for me to do that right now.

im really trying to not break down lol

yes its a bandage but i need a bandage right now i don't have the resources to make me feel better.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

No need to apologise. I also wouldn't just talk to random people to socialize at uni, or anywhere else for that matter. Accepted a conversation when someone brought it up though, and listened to music.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I love my aquarium. I start every weekend by doing a water change, trimming the plants, and just spending some time admiring the fish in silence. Its a nice way to let go of the week.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Listen to music. It allows you to enjoy something without having to use your eyes, especially if you’re in front of a screen the entire day. You can either close your eyes and rest, or just stare outside your window to refresh your vision.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

After a long day, usually just extra thc in one form or another. After a long week, I need some walking with headphones time. I walk or run around the neighborhood listening to music, thinking and feeling. When the weather allows, I bring the dog with me, but he can't take the heat like I can. It's something with the rhythm of my motion and the rhythm of the music and the rhythm of my thoughts. It really resets me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Go crusing Driving all weekend is the best

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I either watch a couple of episodes of some of my favourite sitcoms or of star trek TNG/voyager. Or I just open a book like discworld on my ebook reader and listen to it with my eyes closed, through ear phones, especially if I am experiencing eye fatigue.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I'm usually tired enough that my sleepiness overcomes my anxiety.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I go to the gym, on off days I go for a ride on my mountain bike. Doing something physical forces my mind to disengage from anything other than what I'm doing right that moment.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Weed, beer, sex, camping, reading. Not necessarily in that order.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Trick question. I never unwind.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Well I've picked up the routine of rock climbing at a indoor gym immediately after a tense day of office work. So I've been going almost daily 😂. You pay little to no mind to anything other than wanting to place both hands on the final hold at the end of a route. I also draw A LOT. Spend quality time with my wife listening to her, engaging in conversation with her and I leave my phone away from me. Cook at home and try to be present and in the moment with all my friends young and old. I'm technically monetarily poor and unapologetically-unbelievably happy. Although we used to be monetarily rich we traded that for more personal time and I will never go back to such a slave-like lifestyle (working like an animal to store useless riches and material objects) don't get me wrong we work really hard but just for our essentials and for the sake of keeping a solid reputation of good work ethic on the 3-4 days we work a week. I recommend it to anyone.