this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
145 points (94.5% liked)

Funny

6801 readers
549 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
all 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yeah the person who decides to swallow one whole is not going to have a good time

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Unless you can swallow an extremely dry puck the size of your palm in one bite I think you'd have trouble doing that in the first place

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

Well good news then! It's a suppository!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

These things are the size of a small coin

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (2 children)

There are ones that are tiny, but those are basically facial wipes. The actual towels are hand-sizes

diagram demonstrating steps for creating a towel

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I still don't understand the point of these. Presumably the towel is going to be wet, no?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Disposable, consumer culture.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Takes less room and you might not need one right away so you have time to let it dry. Also even a wet towel can be handy.

But mostly I've seen these as just funny gimmick without much real use other than "oh wow that's neat"

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You've read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, right?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

“A towel, [The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy] says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-boggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.” ― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

[–] [email protected] -1 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I'm not going to read all that

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] -1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Honestly I don't really care, it doesn't seem that relevant and I don't like having irrelevant books quoted at me

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago

🤷‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Fine, I'll paraphrase it for you then. "Towels are really useful when you are traveling the galaxy LOL."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

So that vial is the size of a tennis ball container?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

No, they come in many different sizes.

The camping/backpacking ones are tiny, large pill size easily, but they aren’t big towels, you get basically a disposable towelette out of one. Because physics, really.

And they are almost exclusively super thin and low quality. They do the job with a purpose, but you wouldn’t use one outside of emergency or backpacking or something.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

always have a towel with you, they say.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It would suck up any moisture your mouth produced as you tried to swallow. I doubt someone could swallow it. Choke on it though, for sure.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

And would be changing shape and texture as it did so, you'd have to be trying to swallow it

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Right, but you’d have to be trying really hard and I doubt it would make it to the stomach.

Just being pedantic I guess 🤷🏻‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

Extreme emergency sized tampons.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, funny .. right until they suffocate or rupture their esophagus.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Practical jokes live on the thin line between good laughs and manslaughter

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You can't have manslaughter without mans laughter.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Oh Strawberry Sweetcake, I miss your evil

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Joke aside, I don't get this, why not bring a reusable microfiber towel instead, they can be quite small and lightweight.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

These can be used in interesting ways. There are some small ones that can be placed below a shutoff lever and if it soaks up any water it presses the lever and shuts off water to an appliance.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

It also doesn't make sense because even the small ones are about 2" wide at least.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Is that how fake mediums used to make "ectoplasm"?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Had a 50ct bag of those once. Not really good for much unless youre into making plaster molds