Save us 5 years. Just put the new ipad into e-waste collection now. Meanwhile, anyone want to use all the real tools designed specifically to make music? Any kid with half a brain will spend their $1000 musicmaking budget on something useful
this post was submitted on 10 May 2024
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I actually did not know that Tim Cook is a christian nut job.
Isn’t he gay?
You can’t be gay and a devout Christian. God said so.
I actually think that's perfectly possible because to be a christian you have to already be in denial about a whole boatload of things, so really.. what's one more? And as a bonus "my own people hate me" fits nicely with the whole christian guilt thing.
Can we just STFU about this mediocre ad already? You’re giving it more airtime and more mental bandwidth. I didn’t think it was worth one day of headlines much less two or three.
Ignoring things like this is how we've ended up with an entire generation of people who Apple thinks are either too lazy or too stupid to create art or music on their own.
Note that I am not calling anyone lazy or stupid, I'm just stating Apple thinks this is a desirable outcome and is pushing forward with that plan
Not everyone has the physical talent, space, and time to learn to play an instrument.
So the solution to that is to only make paint-by-numbers music that Apple will allow you to make with their pre approved apps? That sounds like a good way to end up with a lot of mediocre easily digestible music that all sounds the same...
There are plenty of apps that let you do your own thing. Don’t blame the software for musicians being derivative. People have created amazing digital music with significantly less technology. Maybe you just don’t like that people without a formal background (rich people) have the opportunity to make bad (and good) music.
It sounds like your only problem is that you have to use the App Store. So what app was denied by Apple but is available on Android? Yeah, I didn’t think so.
So right. I saw a DJ playing incredible chiptune off’a two original brick gameboys and two LSDJs and it was absolutely amazing. I wish I had the skill to do that.
I have been playing guitar for nearly 20 years. My family has never been rich, which meant I got the most affordable guitar available (which cost MUCH less than an iPad even accounting for inflation) when I started.
I knew absolutely nothing about how to play it and taught myself for the first year from stuff I found in magazines. When it became apparent that I wasn't going to just abandon the thing in the closet my parents agreed to get me lessons for this costly sum of $25 a week.
Since then I have have scrimped and saved to get nicer instruments when I could afford them, and they mean a lot to me so I take care of them and play them often.
When making music becomes reduced to a game from WHICHEVER app store, it loses all meaning because there is zero invested in it. I'm sure there will be a few people who actually manage to make real music this way despite the limitations, but for most people it will just be a toy they lose interest in like Candy Crush or something.
If it were easy to play decent music then everyone in the world would have a top 10 hit
I’m sorry your music career didn’t pan out after all that work. Not everyone can be a musician.
Ah, just going straight into troll mode now huh? That's too bad, I was enjoying our conversation...
Not as bad as your album—oh wait you don’t have one. Maybe if you got an iPad you could make that dream come true.
I see the confusion here... You think playing music is something one does to get fame and money. What you're describing is a content creator, in which case I can see why having an overpriced toy that makes songs for you would be appealing.
For the record I have, in fact, played for a number of audiences and even recorded several albums with various bands that I've been in over the years. I'm sure you wouldn't have heard any of them because they never really made it beyond the local scene. I'm perfectly fine with that though, because I didn't make them to be famous. I made them because I enjoy the creative process involved in songwriting and performance, because I'm a musician.
Aww good for you, my dude. But it’s pretty mean to say that other people, who have music inside them, should be denied. Not all music made using technology is 100% digital anyway. It’s a studio in your home. It allows people who aren’t able to go into a studio, for whatever reason, to produce near-professional music.
Here’s a thought, if you don’t want to listen to music created using an Apple product, then… don’t.
I’ll get off your lawn now. 😅
You are delusional to think even one of the 9 million kids living in poverty in the US would buy a $1000 iPad as a tool to make music. In 5 years that fucking $1000 iPad is only worth cracking open to harvest as e-waste. A kid buying a $50 dollar pawnshop guitar is far more likely to continue to make listenable music than some fucking dipshit buying an iPad. Maybe in 5 years they can sell that guitar for $50 to another kid who will successfully make music. Or maybe they luck out and that guitar is worth $5000. The kid who can afford to buy the $1000 iPad will hopefully use this as a chance to learn about planned obsolesence...
Here's a thought, maybe an iPad is a wasteful piece of garbage technology. Maybe this isn't a rant about technology and preventing opportunities, maybe its a rant against shitty technologies that are wasteful.
Get off all our fucking lawns.
You say from your shitty technological device. Hypocrite
*Frantically types genius rebuttal on iPad
Between working two jobs, never paying off student loans, unobtainable housing, and medical bankruptcy, yeah you're right. Let's just get our dopamine fix and be content with our squalor.
Sounds like a you problem. Don’t piss on everyone else’s parade.
What's "physical talent"?
Having arms to play a guitar.
Agreed. People like to get upset over nothing. It’s a stupid commercial that landed poorly. Someone in the marketing department has way too much control and probably didn’t do a very good focus group for this.
There are plenty of other things about Apple we could be complaining about.
First I've heard of it and you know, you can just ignore it lol. Yet you took the time to make a comment and... complain about talking about it?
Some nut: I haven't been mad today. I need something to be mad about.
Apple launched an ad.
The nut: perfect.
The absolute worst, most annoying thing about every Apple advert and the day-long adverts - the launch day events, is the freaking hyperbole.
(breathlessly exclaim:) The fastest ever. The thinnest ever. More cameras than ever! The most ever ever!
Breathtaking vividly bright Applewordsalad display technology
My coworker is fully bought in to the ecosystem, so I get the full experience every launch day. Listen critically sometime. Turn on your bullshit filter. It's a fun game.
Apple popularised two things that bug the shit out of me in addition to everything you said. "on iPhone" "on iPad" just sounds utterly wrong. It needs to be "on the iPhone" "on the iPad". Now everyone is doing it.
The other is " breathlessly we're excited to announce/we're excited to share with you/we're excited!!!!big fucking cheesy grin". The whole point of having that whole "excited" or whichever adjective you want at that point of the sentence is to prep you and let you know what you're supposed to feel. If it's that good surely you shouldn't have to tell me what I need to feel.
It's because they're trying to instill in your mind that you're getting into an ecosystem. A way of life, even.
"XYZ on the iPhone" just makes it sound like an appliance.
"XYZ on iPhone" makes it sound like it's an ecosystem. An experience. Something to be part of.
It's a very deliberate (though subtle) marketing choice that I believe impacts how people view the brand.
Why is thinnest ever placed in such high regard? Have you seen how ridiculous the new iPad Pro looks when the Pencil is attached to it for charging?
I think I'm in the vocal minority in that I really don't give a shit about thin, especially if it affects performance, repairability, or battery life.
They're trying to beat paper
The Register calls it Xitter? epic
Is it pronounced “shitter”?
Of course.
These are the kind of ads you make when you have a profound lack of self-awareness.
they should have run the commercial in reverse.
Yup and then have something like "all of this creativity in one compact device. The all new iPad"
Or simply squish them like they were rubber instead of destroying them.
This whole outcry is a joke.
They're symbolizing all the creative things, that they just talked about, that you can do with the iPad.
If you got Apple is "destroying creativity" from that, you A) only saw the clip or B) are searching for problem.
If you got Apple is “destroying creativity” from that, you A) only saw the clip or B) are searching for problem.
The outcry's not really Apple, but tech in general. The backlash of crushing the human experience is the transition from valuing true art and creativity, and just lurching toward yet another do-everything screen that doesn't compliment creativity, but instead displaces it, with the hint of incoming generative AI.
Apple really doesn't give a fuck about art, creativity, expression, or for that matter quality anymore. They're good at making a thing that sells, they're good at marketing it, and they're good at convincing people of the cost vs worth equation that gives them insane margins over their chic branding. I love the outcry not because of any validity behind the detriment of tablets and smartphones (which is absolutely there) but moreso because it's entertaining when a company renowned for their advertising prowess fucks up so publicly then backpedals with apologies.
Good times, and fuck Apple.
Yeah, I'm no marketing guru, but I feel their actual point would have been better conveyed by a pile of all of the things the iPad replaced slowly gathering dust, spider webs, and eventually archaeologists.