Luckily hippos aren't known to be good at biking.

Hippos don’t actually swim. They run along the bottom.

You could just take your time. The bike portion will stop them completely.

I would rather challenge them in another Olympic sport. I can't imagine they'd be good at table tennis.

Her: I bet he's thinking about other girls.

Him:

I read hippos as hippies and was thoroughly confused by the time I read the whole thing

Thought I still had to head back to reddit for the Triathlon threads, but here we are.

This reminds me of a time I was beaten by a hippo in a triathlon, bad memories all around

This is bad for me, because someone stole my bike.