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if you call everyone dude and a transfem person gets mad about it, don't get defensive. just say like "sorry, i won't do it again" and don't argue "actually it's gender neutral" or "i call everyone dude". even if you do, i guarantee she's heard that argument from someone who very much does not call people they see as women dude. i certainly have
same goes double for the word guy.
lol the speaker started talking about this during a lecture about unconscious bias training and I immediately checked out, especially because the rest of the lecture had literally nothing to do with implicit bias, even though she kept claiming it did. it was kind of infuriating.
also 100 replies in this thread is extremely sus.
idk what happened tbh, this was just something that frustrates me and i wanted to complain and then like 20 people made jokes and it ended up on the main page when sorting by hot
Both of these drive me crazy. Its like, why. Also, I just don't know if I'm getting misgendered or not. And it bothers me
Gals is gender neutral
morelike, dude (derogatory), I feel the same way about mate, I've accidentally blurted out it implies reproduction more than once.
dude likely comes from Yankee Doodle, and later meant something like city slicker, think fancy man, or f#g (politely) 🙄, dont call me dude, bro
If you've seen Easy Rider (1969), you know what happens to Yankee Dudes (they get murdered)
Anyway, I heard women and dudes used the other day and I can't stop laughing about it
The only time I will accept the "dude is gender neutral" argument is if you are from Santa Cruz and we are in Santa Cruz.
Ok, tovarshi/tongzhi-men, instead of guys/dudes...
I know we're trying to having a serious discussion, but I got distracted by the vriska pfp
you got a problem with vriska?
Nah, quite the opposite actually. Vriska is cool 😎
hell yeah 8888)
I used to default to calling everyone dude unless they say otherwise. I call my sisters dude. Recently I have learned this is bad.
Luckily I am not a giant baby so it is nbd. I have resolved to not be like a boomer and let my language evolve without complaining
Side note I can understand why people may not want to be called dude. I hate being called "sis" or "girl" by gay dudes, it is both weirdly affirming and incredibly dysphoric all in the same package.
I dont really call people dude, but I do say dood at the end of sentences like the Prinnies from Disgaea. It can get confusing so if someone said it stressed them out I would stop.
Yeah, that's the thing. I have a friend who's enby and transitioned over the time I knew them. Ran into them earlier this year, and casually dropped a "dude" out of habit/forgetting, and then was like, "is that OK with you?" They're fine with it, but if they ever expressed otherwise I'd do my best not to call them that.
It's not rocket science. Just because I can call a woman "dude" doesn't magically change the meaning of the word.
guy (n.2) "fellow," 1847, American English; earlier, in British English (1836) "grotesquely or poorly dressed person," originally (1806) "effigy of Guy Fawkes,"
Dude. 1883, "fastidious man," New York City slang of unknown origin; recent research suggests it is a shortening of Yankee Doodle, based on the song's notion of "foppish, over-fastidious male" (compare macaroni). The vogue word of 1883, originally used in reference to the devotees of the "aesthetic" craze, later applied to city slickers, especially Easterners vacationing in the West (as in dude ranch "ranch which entertains guests and tourists for pay," attested by 1921).
I'm never using either of these again y'all
I guess this has become a massive chat zone, so, anyone know the general opinion on people who always ask pronouns and desired forms of address to people? Because i do that, and I’ve seen people dunk on stuff like pronoun circles and I’m not sure if that’s a dunk on pronoun asking in general or just doing it selectively to people you clock
For me, pronoun circles are fine. However, if someone invokes a pronoun circle mid-conversation, then it's clear I've been clocked and I become extremely uncomfortable. Dunno about selectively as that somehow has yet to happen to me and I'd prefer to not speculate. I just know I despise being noticeably clocked.
Yeah I would prefer to mandate pronoun badges or a pronoun circle at the beginning of every meet without exceptions. Doing it selectively sucks
i am fine with pronoun circles, but sometimes you can tell people have clocked you and are either doing it because of that or really focusing on you. and even without that there's always a lot of anxiety tied up in it, especially before i was out when i had to intentionally misgender myself which was super painful
i thought we'd made some progress on making dude gender neutral, but if that's not the case i'm just going to call everyone "fucker"