this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2023
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Asklemmy

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The throne, John, "sitting down", "dropping cargo" are rather harmless examples. I have marked this NSFW as a precaution. 🫣

Do your best and your worst.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I read a while back at the other site that we've all flocked away from. This person's first language was clearly not English, though I have no idea what it was.

Anyway, he direct translated what is commonly said in his language and I found it hilarious.

Drum roll please...

"I needed to empty my ass".

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'm my local dialect of Arabic we say some hilarious expressions for peeing including:

I'm going to fly some water (like flying a kite)
I'm answering nature's call
I'm paying the judge.

My favorite term for pooping in nature when we go hiking was:

Planting a mine

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Was that last one some self-deprecating humor?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Not really an answer to the question, but does anyone else think that the phrases "take a shit" and "give a shit" seem swapped? You say you're gonna take a shit when you are giving one to the toilet, and you say you don't give a shit when you are unwilling to take shit.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Taking a dump

Dropping a deuce

Drop a bomb (blow up this bathroom)

On the throne

Number two

Pinch a loaf

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Laying a fudge dragon, Dropping the kids off at the pool

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Release the kraken

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

An old timey one I heard was 'I need to see a man about a horse' and one I've actually heard people use was 'I need to drop the kids off at the pool.'

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Or man about a dog.

We had to stop when the kids kept getting excited for a puppy twice a day.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Pooping station

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Leave a deposit, drop the kids off at the pool.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I'll be in my office downloading some files.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Drop the Browns off at the Super Bowl, drop a duece, β€œare you gonna take a [first name] and wipe your [last name]?”

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Posting on reddit

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

AGB .. After Grog Bog. That poo you do the next day after a night on the turps and once you do this, you feel so much more human.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

"Practicing the tuba" is my go-to with peers, but if I need to be delicate I might say someone "had to step into another room for a minute". To my family, I say "I'm going to sit down upstairs for a little while" and they know what I mean.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

"delivery report"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Growing a tail.

Backing one out.

Laying some deep sea cable.

Taking an Edgar/Bradley/Travis (Britt/Pitt/Tritt)

Snapping one off.

Pinching off a loaf.

Giving birth to a project manager.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Dropping the kids off at a pool

Committing a war crime

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Sending a memo to the CEO, if it’s a work poo

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

After the Lies of P trailer, I say I have to "activate my P organ"

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Taking a crap (crappers were common toilets back in the day, I actually used a crapper toilet recently, that was a day to remember)

Us Brits offten call the toilet 'the bog'

Doing a poo is the most frequent in my house.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

face burp im gonna take a shit

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Laying cable.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The throne is a frequent one.

Also releasing torpedoes, and Talking to God

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