this post was submitted on 29 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 66 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I'm 2 paragraphs in and I'm tapping out, I'm pretty sure I can feel my brain melting from the inside and I don't wanna make a mess on my keyboard by reading further.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

And why is it called tapping out? That's right, because in professional wrestling, those who give up the fight tap the floor! They're teaching your kids to give up! 😡

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I mean, that one's actually accurate, yeah?

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Good for you. I only made it to berth

[–] [email protected] 27 points 9 months ago

The president represent leadership. What is lead? A poisonous metal. And the president? Like the dent left in a baby's head when the nurse drops him in the maternity ward.

It all lines up, folks.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

You're probably right to do so. It just gets more painful.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 9 months ago (1 children)

What in the flying hell is a “dock-ore”?

[–] [email protected] 48 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Obviously it means dock, as in where a ship moors, and ore, a common product on ships /s

But unironocally, that's probably exactly their reasoning...

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)

A buck gets ten you’re exactly right.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Maybe he meant dock-oar. Like a contrived term for a rower of a boat, and just didn't think to check the difference between ore and oar. Not that it's any less stupid

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[–] [email protected] 55 points 9 months ago (2 children)

This is like Billy Madison's answer to the Industrial Revolution question.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 9 months ago

I do feel dumber after reading it

[–] [email protected] 25 points 9 months ago

...and may God have mercy on your soul.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I'll never get these people. There's this vast conspiracy... But they they intentionally leave all these fucking hints?

[–] [email protected] 44 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Maybe it's more fun being a secret society that runs the world if the only people who can figure it out are the stupidest fuckers in the world

[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Hey I like this. It's kind of a conspiracy theory all of its own.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

They're living in a fairy tale. So to them, government works like making a deal with the devil: he's allowed to deceive you but he can't lie to you.

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

Why are they so infatuated with this weirdo naval law thing they have going on? Like asking judges if they adjudicate under banner of a maritime vessel according to the Queen of Roxbury statute because otherwise their conveyance would be considered void by rite of Shaka when the walls fell. They just love maritime law for some reason.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (2 children)

They have this weird theory that the naval courts took over all the other courts a few centuries ago. Under the secret command of the Templars, of course (who secretly control the Red Cross, the Swiss, and the British Royalty—you can tell by the red crosses on their stuff).

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 9 months ago

This is a sort of word salad / free association / confabulation that is typical of schizophrenia

[–] [email protected] 34 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You know how when you're a teenager, you're told you should "grow up and get a job"? Ever notice how "job" also refers to biblical texts that say at the end of your inevitable suffering, God will be with you, for he is just? Also worth noting: suffering is very close to surfing, i.e. travel via ocean, which is like a boat. Another big boat was the ark, pointing again! to the Bible. Remember when I said "grow up" earlier? That is probably because it is so close to "group", which, with the other noted connotations, ties in with biblical stories = Bible Group. Because all of these messages come together when you are a teen, obviously we are talking about children's Bible study. "Children's" can be shortened to the word "chirruns", aka "trains" so Trains Bible Study would be manufacturers instructions for freight trains, which could *also" mean "fraught trains", because ghosts.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

You were worryingly good at that..

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The fallacy, among others, they're committing is called equivocation, by the way. They use a meaning of one word one minute and another the next, when it suits them to win the confrontation.

This is why debate and talking don't actually solve problems. People can and will just do stupid shit like this in bad faith to get you to acquiesce to them or stop challenging them.

People like that need ass-beatings until they're willing to conform to the dictionary's definitions of words and the rules of debate.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago

Have you ever thought about about words? Have you ever thought about how some words mean some thing, while other words mean a different thing?

Words, man.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

The word is ent -omology. The root “ent” comes from the word “ant,” because we are all ants under god’s magnifying glass (a.k.a. “The ozone layer”), and “omology” comes from the secret chant from the knights Templar (the pope’s secret army boyz), and it roughly translates to “nana nana poo poo” because the Illuminati is so brazen that they hide clues and taunts everywhere, from word structure to the writing that appears on my bathroom mirror when I take a shower and the humidity (a.k.a. “Water air,” or “O2h2O,” commonly written as “uwu” by the pope’s online army boyz) makes the mirror taste good.

it’s all connected

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Something that I'd be interested in seeing:

Get one of these sovereign citizens to gather up all of their official ... "documents". Next, stick them on a plane and drop them off on another continent, and then watch them throw their sovereign citizen weight around, and try to get back to the country where they refuse to cooperate with basic laws, rules and regulations.

I definitely would like to see how a sovereign citizen's homemade passport would go over in Uzbekistan, Zimbabwe, or Cambodia.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

I would also enjoy this. One tried to go someplace with her "world passport" and has it seized.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Took some googling but found the actual book the quote is from.

Surprisingly high rating

I am of a firm belief that what words we use do matter a lot and shapes our perception of the world but this is some outlandish shit

Edit: Link to book on drive

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago (2 children)

The hospital thing is partly true, though meaningless when it comes to avoiding taxes or speeding tickets. They weren't really a private army of the Vatican, though they did have knights and stuff. Extremely interesting fact: the Knights Hospitalier had a large (non-combat) air force for a minute due to technically being a country with no land. https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1151832864494903296.html

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This is some pretty off-target ideation.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago

There's a whole book about it and it is hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You know, when I was a kid, I'd see crazy people in asylums on TV shows like the 3 Stooges just laughing it up, having a great time. I thought "man, it must be great to be crazy, look at all the fun they're having, not a care in the world!" Now, as a 'grown up', I see mental illness everywhere, and those suffering from it like Trump supporters or flat earthers or sovereign citizens are so deeply angry and sad and lost, I almost feel bad for them. Almost.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Love these posts bones! I had no idea this was such a big movement.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Isn't it wild? I just joined one out of curiosity via a Reddit post, and since then I've fallen down all their rabbit holes. There's thousands in their groups and they're all equally bonkers. Never seen anything like it!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (4 children)

It's pretty sad. My mom fell into it hard around 2018, and back in 2020 when I stopped talking to her she was going on about how some guy in Montana was now the official ruler of the US because he filed an application to claim the United States flag during some obligatory grace period before the US sold it to the King of England. Mind you, this was before the queen died - she was convinced that the previous king was still alive and scheming to regain British ownership of the US, and that this Montana guy saved it at the last second. She was literally crying in joy.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

The Venn diagram overlap of people who know how to insert footnotes and people with untreated Schizophrenia must be pretty small.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (2 children)

This has to be a troll.

Please be a troll.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago

It looks more like a sincere but mentally ill person to me. But there's no way to know.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

That's a pretty convoluted way to say people are required to work under our (or really any realistic) economy.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

It feels like I'm reading a 4chan shitpost from someone who actually bought into all the fucking stupidity, but trimmed the part blasting the ships of relation, friend and owner.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

I love these guys, and all the conspiracy or conspiracy adjacent people (as long as they're mostly harmless.)

I'm jealous of all of them. The world they live in is so much more interesting than mine.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago

Sovereign Citizens practicing witchcraft is my favorite thing.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Ew. This reads like the sort of bullshit my mother regurgitates. 🤮🤮🤮

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Seems inspired by The Matrix with the human battery stuff

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Holy shit the fact that this document has more than 40 footnotes is mind numbing

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (1 children)

i love sovereign citizens. they just walk right into their own pitfalls and it's a joy to see.

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