848
toilet humour (lemmy.world)
submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 97 points 3 months ago

PSA: For maximum hygiene, close the lid BEFORE you flush.

[-] [email protected] 69 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

closes lid

Sits down

Shits on lid

Flushes

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago
[-] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

My name’s not dunk

[-] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Taking 'Upper decker' to the next level

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

But then how am I supposed to look at my poop swirling down the drain?

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[-] [email protected] 47 points 3 months ago

Flushing after closing the lid is actually hygienic.

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[-] [email protected] 47 points 3 months ago

Plus if you drop anything in the bathroom and the lid is up it's ending up in the toilet, learned that one morning when I was about to brush my teeth, that's when I became a dedicated kid closer

[-] [email protected] 62 points 3 months ago

dedicated kid closer

"Listen, I just know you're going to love this play set; and what a deal you're getting on it, too!"

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[-] [email protected] 46 points 3 months ago

I always flush with the lid down. Keeps less in the air.

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[-] [email protected] 41 points 3 months ago

Plus, it’s more mysterious and potentially surprising.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Yeah that coworker who never removes his stains loves to make people focus on it.

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[-] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago

If you don't shut the lid before you flush it sends poopoo peee particles flying around the bathroom onto your toothbrush

[-] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago

Mythbusters found it makes virtually no difference, and lid down can actually make particles go further due to the pressure forcing them through a smaller gap.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago
[-] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Please look this up for yourself- these responses are sus

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

What episode was this? I can only find evidence of the opposite of what you're claiming here

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

This is legit the reason I started putting the lid down as a kid lmao

[-] [email protected] 28 points 3 months ago

I close the lid because otherwise my cat will drink out of the toilet

[-] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

Seat AND lid go down, always, no exceptions. Other than having a fundamental redesign of the entire structure, this is the only correct solution.

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[-] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

I truly don't understand how this is a thing at all... Takes less than a second to open the lid, why would you not close it by default?

[-] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

Just automate it and get a Japanese Bidet that opens and closes automatically. Problem solved.

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

Get one of those non-slamming lids and it's too easy to knock if down while flushing. It's half closed as you leave the room.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago

Only downside is when you're at a friend's place and realize too late that they don't have such an awesome amenity. You end up being the toilet slamming asshole, yet again.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

I'm feeling déjà vu reading this comment

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

Only at 25 I have learned I am supposed to close the lid, no one ever said anything about that before in my life. Now I am always doing it.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

That probably means your parents didn't put it down in the house you grew up in. You would have worked out it was always closed every time you walk in.

So you were never going to learn at home, you did well to work that out at 25

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

You also are allowed to flush when you put the toilet seat down, as is evidenced in the diagram.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Yes I always leave it closed if it has a tank

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Not humour, just facts.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

This is how I needed this dilemma explained to me.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago
[-] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Best reason to close the lid: The things you do in the toilet smell. Lid keeps the smells from spreading.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago
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[-] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Chair height, elongated bowl for the win.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Real pros streamline and take off the seat and lid altogether.

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this post was submitted on 30 Nov 2023
848 points (96.0% liked)

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