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this post was submitted on 05 Mar 2024
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neurodiverse
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What is Neurodivergence?
It's ADHD, Autism, OCD, schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, bi-polar, aspd, etc etc etc etc
“neurologically atypical patterns of thought or behavior”
So, it’s very broad, if you feel like it describes you then it does as far as we're concerned
Rules
1.) ableist language=post or comment will probably get removed (enforced case by case, some comments will be removed and restored due to complex situations). repeated use of ableist language=banned from comm and possibly site depending on severity. properly tagged posts with CW can use them for the purposes of discussing them
2.) always assume good faith when dealing with a fellow nd comrade especially due to lack of social awareness being a common symptom of neurodivergence
2.5) right to disengage is rigidly enforced. violations will get you purged from the comm. see rule 3 for explanation on appeals
3.) no talking over nd comrades about things you haven't personally experienced as a neurotypical chapo, you will be purged. If you're ND it is absolutely fine to give your own perspective if it conflicts with another's, but do so with empathy and the intention to learn about each other, not prove who's experience is valid. Appeal process is like appealing in user union but you dm the nd comrade you talked over with your appeal (so make it a good one) and then dm the mods with screenshot proof that you resolved it. fake screenies will get you banned from the site, we will confirm with the comrade you dm'd.
3.5) everyone has their own lived experiences, and to invalidate them is to post cringe. comments will be removed on a case by case basis depending on determined level of awareness and faith
4.) Interest Policing will not be tolerated in any form. Support your comrades in their joy!
Further rules to be added/ rules to be changed based on community input
RULES NOTE: For this community more than most we understand that the clarity and understandability of these rules is very important for allowing folks to feel comfortable, to that end please don't be afraid to be outspoken about amendments and addendums to these rules, as well as any we may have missed
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I think a lot of ND people are basically trained, whether it's ABA or bullying or whatever, to not have boundaries. So sometimes when others have boundaries it can be weird or even upsetting to us, because we're literally not allowed to have any. We're constantly people pleasing and fawning and masking etc. So when someone is like "Stop" it's like record scratch what? Wtf you're allowed to just say that and make things stop? Since when? I could never do that!
And if it's not a trauma reaction like the above, sometimes it's just a misunderstanding of tone, where you're seen as "arguing" when you're just like, talking and trying to understand them. Talking through text is the wooorst for this. I am constantly seeing arguments on my social media feeds that sprang out of nowhere when somebody just decided to put in their 2 cents and somebody else took it personal. Nobody understands the other and next thing you know they've blocked each other over nothing.
Sometimes people are very private, like my boyfriend for example. I might say something totally innocent in passing about him or about us, that I thought was like something cute or silly, and then he'll get very upset and basically act like I just told the whole world his nastiest sexual kink or something. Then I get angry because it's like the trauma thing, I have literally no boundaries and now suddenly it's record scratch stop. What? So yeah lol.
Oooooo yeah Ive had huge problem with the "secrets that arent specifically defined as secrets" thing. I dont have many if any serious secrets (though I do kinda hate being talked about behind my back, if its negative) so I just dont tihnk about it with other people's things.
Actually that reminds me of another time I blew past someone's boundaries when they tried to get across to me that it was a boundary, but I didnt get it because they were too "nice" about it. My first time lmao. I told tons of people a ton of details about that, and some of it got back around to her. And she didnt even want people knowing we hooked up at all X_X . And when we were just hanging out at the computer after, and I was about to make a post jokingly hinting at it, she like uncomfortably said I shouldnt, And I just blew past it and didnt get it.
Uuuuuuugh.